


Sixth Spring

by alyshka, Chiruo



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canon Compliant, Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Light Angst, M/M, Missing Scene, School, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-29 02:03:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17799029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alyshka/pseuds/alyshka, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chiruo/pseuds/Chiruo
Summary: Spring of Sixth Year at Hogwarts, 1977.  In the midst of N.E.W.T. exams, Quidditch games, and their "furry little problem," things are changing for the Marauders.  While the Map nears completion, Sirius' family ties dissolve with finality and, for the first time, Lily is actually giving James a chance.  But, with only one full year left at Hogwarts and the shadows of war beginning to loom on their horizon, it's uncertain what all this means for the inseparable friends and for the future.  Wolfstar with a side of Jily.  LANGUAGE WARNING.





	Sixth Spring

**~ January 1977 ~**

I.

As the twinkle of the holidays faded to the hush of winter, a modest blanket had settled over the castle. Those who had stayed behind now watched the dance of students winding through the courtyard and halls, returning bustle to the school in stray snowballs and wet footprints. In a harmony of excitement and chagrin, shouts of classmates and the thump of trunks echoed through the gothic vaults. Light blazed anew from darkened windows, and Hogwarts breathed a pleasant sigh against the muffled chill of January.

In the Gryffindor dormitory, frost filigree edged the glass panes, as if to pry curiously at the warm glow within. Amid an array of scattered parchment, Remus Lupin sat crossed-legged on one bed, hunched over a large book that splayed open in front of him. A page turned, crisply audible despite the distant murmur of activity. At length, it was the silence in the room that caught his attention and pulled it from his study towards his companion.

Sirius Black was curled up in dog form at the foot of the bed, enjoying his last chance to indulge his animagi nature in the dorm for some time. He thumped his tail as Remus looked up at him and then elegantly returned to human form, stretching out on top of the piles of parchment. “Can’t believe you’re studying already.” He gave Remus’ leg a nudge with his elbow. “Technically we don’t have to worry about that rot again until tomorrow.”

"Well, technically, you don't have to sit around and watch me." Remus returned the nudge as he pulled a few sheets out from under Sirius' sprawling form. Stacking the leaves loosely, he closed the book on them and set them aside. "Is there something you wanted to do?"

Sirius scooted to his knees and leaned close to Remus. “Maybe.” His lips brushed Remus’ before he turned away and hopped off the bed. “Want to go find some first-years to fuck with?” Ideally, he would’ve spent the rest of the evening lounging by Remus’ side, but even he had a limit for risk-taking. Peter was bound to blunder in any minute now.

A mellow warmth shaped Remus' expression as he gathered the rest of his homework. "Surely, that's just what they had in mind when they thought up prefects," he laughed. Getting up, he tugged on a loose jumper that had draped a chair back. "Well, we can't have you going stir crazy already, Padfoot." He gave Sirius' hand a brief squeeze as they jostled towards the common room.

Soon they found themselves negotiating the hubbub of their classmates' arrival, Remus following Sirius in tandem. Sirius tossed his dark, tousled hair, feeling his fellow students’ eyes on him. A blessing and a curse, that attention. While flattering, it left him instinctively distancing himself from Remus whenever they were in public together. He liked having Remus as his secret—but sometimes he just wanted to be able to keep hold of Moony’s hand, dammit.

Remus trailed comfortably in Sirius' shadow, habitually preferring the ease of inattention. When there was no sign of James or Lily in the Gryffindor common room, the pair carried on to the castle halls, wandering with a pleasant aimlessness, exchanging greetings with some of their peers but not attaching themselves to anyone else.

"Sirius." The voice held in equal measure familiarity and formality, as a figure in green-lined robes angled towards them. The student very much reflected the features of his elder brother, although to consider them alike strongly disregarded the innate elegance of the latter.

“Regulus,” Sirius growled, almost literally. “I’ll bet you had a lovely holiday with our dear parents.”

Regulus' dismissive shrug seemed more confirmation than denial. "Father was displeased with your absence; mother said it was probably for the best." He frowned slightly, his gaze wandering over Sirius' shoulder to Remus.

“Well, I suppose mother and I are in agreement for once.”

The younger boy's expression soured. "Well, good! I hope you had a lovely holiday with your 'friends.' Tell Potter that he'd better be ready out on the pitch. Lupin."

"Regulus," Remus framed an ambivalent smile, as the boy abruptly brushed on.

Sirius spent a moment silently fuming at his brother’s back before spinning on his heel. “Well, that’s out of the way now. Let’s go find some better company.”

Remus cast a final look towards the retreating figure, then turned to follow Sirius. With wry resignation, he put a hand on his friend's shoulder, giving it an encouraging shake. They walked abreast in silence, Sirius still palpably seething.

The pair were interrupted mid-stride by the unexpected addition of an arm thrown over each of their shoulders and the interjection of a dirty-blond mop between them. "Hello, mates!" A cheerful, if doltish, face glanced between them energetically, "How were the holidays? I've just got back and been looking all over for you lot!"

“Could’ve tried looking in our room.” Sirius’ tone was light, no edge to his ribbing; it was hard to hate the inoffensively clueless Peter. Even if he did share Regulus’ tendency to put the wishes of mummy dearest above all else. “Have a good holiday without us?” This time, a harder note crept in.

"Ye-eah," Peter said, with sheepish honesty. "But I would have rather stayed with you guys," he appealed. "You know how mum is; I would have never heard the end of it."

Sirius thought of several replies but refrained from speaking them, settling for, “Well, wait’ll you hear what you missed,” and giving Peter a smirk.

The trio was pulled closer together as Peter leaned forward eagerly. "No! What did you do?!" His eyes widened with both excitement and a genuine concern over being left out, as he tried to work out possibilities.

“We should wait to tell it until James is here, don’t you think?” Sirius cast a glance at Remus, even though he knew it wasn’t fair to try to rope him into taunting Peter. He had always remained too stolidly kind-hearted to enjoy poking fun at their dim-witted friend.

Remus shook his head at Sirius in disapproving amusement, but allowed the joke to persist. Oblivious, the shorter boy hung heavily between them, wrestling with Sirius' argument. "Can't you give me a hint?" he pleaded.

“Well, I suppose I can tell you that we rescued someone from being eaten by a horde of spiders, earning the professors’ undying gratitude. We’re basically the heroes of Hogwarts now.”

"You're kidding!" Peter exclaimed, although his tone instead emphasized belief. Glancing at Remus, his expression blossomed into awe of his two friends. "That happened?!"

"Well, sort of," Remus hedged, though this did little to alter Peter's engrossment.

Sirius waved a hand as if heroic feats were a daily occurrence for him. “It was easy enough. There were only six or so spiders, and they were only about this big.” He spread his hands to indicate a size that anyone would consider giant for a spider.

Although his admiration remained unchanged, Peter's face suddenly lessened in jealousy. "Blimey! I'd have liked to have seen that!" he said, wrinkling his nose.

Losing interest in his game, Sirius glanced around the crowd. “Don’t worry, I’m sure something else’ll come up before too long. Anyway, where the devil is James?”

"Probably somewhere with Lils?" Remus suggested, gently ducking away from Peter's arm.

"Yeah, I haven't seen him," Peter offered, rebounding pleasantly. "Should we look for them?"

Remus looked uncertain. "I was hoping to finish my herbology readings."

Sirius took a moment to study Remus. He was a bit pale already, and his face had a strained look to it. “Maybe you should do that,” he admitted. “We’ll find James, and then we’ll all come bother you again.”

A slight relief was noticeable at the proposal. "Alright," Remus nodded, "Just don't do anything too exciting without me, yeah?" He grinned playfully, but, while sincere, it lacked its full usual energy. For a moment, his gaze lingered on Sirius, then he turned for the dormitories.

"Right then!" Peter piped up. "You think he's out at the pitch?"

Sirius watched Remus’ retreat for a moment, feeling that unease that always came with this time of the month. Then his attention shifted back to Peter--who probably didn’t even remember that the full moon was just a few days away. “Yeah, probably showing off for Evans. Or trying to, at any rate. Let’s go see.”

The courtyard lay under a blanket of snow, deepening with the cascade of flakes that drifted lazily down and filled the prints criss-crossing the open grounds. As the boys neared the path towards the Quidditch pitch, they heard voices exchanging ahead.

"And here come your friends," the redhead teased, tossing a handful of snow in James’ direction. "Must be nice to know someone can't live without you."

Rosy cheeks suggested the conclusion of a lengthy excursion, as the pair approached, slipping in the drifted lane.

"Hello!" Lily Evans called out, laughing, "Here's your James Potter, and you are welcome to him!"

"You don't have to go just because they turn up," James protested, holding up an arm against another snowball.

"No," Lily replied merrily, "I have to go because there are first years that probably forgot the password and second years who won't tell it to them!" She smiled at each of them and, with a wave, broke into a run across the courtyard.

As he watched her go, James wore an absent-minded smile that blended with the chill stinging color to his cheeks.

"James!" Peter burst out, glancing several times between his friend and the now-distant figure, "Are you and Lily Evans...?"

James' expression shifted to a lopsided grin, as his fingers swept the snow from his hair. "No!" he laughed, then added slyly, "Not yet."

Sirius elbowed his friend in the ribs. “So, she’s finally warming up to you, eh? I knew dragging her along on our misadventures was a good idea. Maybe you’ll actually get her to loosen up one of these days.”

James grinned, "Here's hoping, mate!" He stuck his hands in his pockets with an easy slouch. "Seems that bit with the house-elf has gone over nicely. Also seems I stack up pretty well next to you and Moony. Honestly, no wonder you didn't have dates to the Yule Ball!"

Sirius opened his mouth to protest that there was nothing wrong with Remus that would make James look better by comparison, and of course Remus could have had a date to the Yule Ball, if he’d wanted to. But he caught himself in time. “Let’s not forget that you didn’t either. And you can say it’s because you didn’t want any girl but Lily, but we all know no other girl would be willing to put up with you.”

"I had a date," Peter interjected, proudly.

"No, you didn't," James jokingly dismissed him.

"Yes, I did," Peter insisted, "That's why I didn't go with the rest of you. You saw me, I was there with--"

"Never saw any such thing," James asserted, as Peter deflated, "It never happened. Did it, Sirius?"

“No, definitely not. I think it was all in your head, Wormy.” Sirius gave the shorter boy’s hair a quick scuff. “Chin up, though. Maybe by the time the next ball comes around, you’ll be able to get a real date instead of an imaginary one.”

Peter sullenly abandoned his protest, falling in step as they started back towards the castle. "So," James leaned conspiratorially towards Sirius, "Do we have any plans for our furry little problem?"

Much as he hated seeing Remus suffer, Sirius’ mind soared at the thought of their approaching monthly excursion. Such freedom, with no professors or prefects around to scold them--well, there was Remus, but he didn’t count; not in human form, and certainly not as a wolf. To run through the darkness, feeling unstoppable, invincible, going where they pleased, laughing at their close calls afterward. There was no thrill like it.

“Just the usual, I’d expect. Do some more exploring in the forest.” In dog form, there was no end to the discoveries to be made--whether it was a pie on a windowsill or the traces of two classmates who’d been sneaking out to meet in secret, his nose could always reveal something worthwhile.

"The usual, it is," James agreed with furtive delight. "You up for that, Pete?" He jostled the other boy playfully, who nodded eagerly. "Brilliant," James concluded.

II.

The sand slipped through the hourglass on Flitwick's desk with an infuriating lethargy, as the tiny professor had long ago lost the full attention of at least three of his students. Beside them, one desk was conspicuously vacant and seemed to be more of a distraction to the trio for it. At last, the final grains slid to the lower bulb and Flitwick set down his wand. James stood immediately, gathering parchment in careless handfuls and stuffing them into a leather satchel as the demure professor droned their dismissal.

Sirius gave a final glance down at the notes he’d tried to take for Remus; Moony hated having to miss classes. Halfway down the page, though, his efforts had devolved into an unflattering sketch of Snivellus, seated a few rows ahead. It would probably be a good idea to copy the notes onto a fresh sheet… later. He hopped up, grabbed his things, and pushed through the crowd of students after James.

James waited only long enough for Sirius to match stride, and then they quickly abandoned their classmates. A few paces behind, Peter trotted to catch up. "Finally!" James exclaimed as they left earshot of the classroom. "I was starting to think old Flit had put a memory charm on himself and forgotten that classes are meant to end."

Sirius laughed in agreement, but for him, the past few hours might as well have been charmed out of existence. He had to restrain himself from breaking into a run.

An anticipatory glow surrounded the trio as they dashed through the halls as quickly as they dared. Remus looked up as they piled into the Gryffindor dormitory room. He was sitting on his bed, with knees bent towards his chest. "I thought you weren't going to make it," he joked, slowly pushing aside a few books that surrounded him. He was noticeably pale, which only emphasized the grey strands scattered throughout his hair.

Peter darted forward, jumping onto the bed. As he did, the books leapt in the air, one tumbling to the floor. James tossed his satchel away and joined them. "Course not!" James was in his element. "Same as usual! Wormy will do his bit," he mussed the blond mop affectionately, "And we'll make a night of it!"

Remus nodded. Although the energy of his friends was infectious, the strain of his condition was obvious. "I'll be heading down in a bit." He glanced up at Sirius and smiled.

Sirius produced a quick smile in return and bent to retrieve the fallen book. “We’ll be close behind. As always.” He handed the book to Remus and gave him a nudge with his elbow. “You’ll feel better once we’ve found some mischief to get up to.”

Remus smiled again and leaned into the nudge. Taking the book, he set it where it could rest safely and moved over to make space for Sirius.

"Of course you will, mate," James agreed. "We all could use the action."

"Especially after class today," Peter rolled his eyes.

Sirius squeezed in next to Remus, glad the crowded bed gave him an excuse to sit close. “Even you would have been bored.”

Remus laughed. "Surely, I'm not that good of a student. I just try." He leaned comfortably against Sirius' shoulder as Peter began attempting an imitation of Flitwick and James became engrossed in coaching him.

Sirius stole the opportunity to trace a finger across Remus’ hand. “You doing all right, though?” he asked softly. “No worse than usual?”

Remus glanced up to meet Sirius' gaze. "I'm fine," he assured quietly. His gaze wandered towards the window, checking the daylight.

“Suppose you should be heading out soon.” Sirius’ voice was wistful. In just a short while their night of adventure would commence, but this part, where Moony had to go off to transform alone…

"You are probably right," Remus admitted, as the jovial antics of their friends jostled the over-crowded bed. Reluctantly, he got up and readied himself. "I'll see you all in a bit, then," he announced.

"Just as soon as that moon's out, mate," James grinned. Peter nodded, looking up from the sprawl of some feigned hex.

“That’s right.” Sirius forced a cocky grin. “Now, off you go.”

With a wave, Remus disappeared down the hall. Their fun interrupted, James and Peter were momentarily quiet. Lolling across the bed, Peter idly reached for a book. James prodded him with a foot. "Well, now we wait..."

Darkness crept over the world with agonizing slowness, but, finally, it was time. Map checked, cloak flung over themselves, the three made their way through the castle and out into the night. As soon as they were safely outside, Sirius melted into his dog form and sprinted toward the Whomping Willow, dancing just out of its reach as he waited for Peter to catch up.

Peter skittered beneath the swaying branches, disappearing into the hollow, but not before James was pawing the ground impatiently. As the Willow twisted in its tell-tale pause, the stag tossed his antlers and trotted towards the opening in the knotted roots. Ducking his head, he dropped carefully into the earthy tunnel below. Peter was waiting, sat up on his haunches, and immediately darted down the passage. James snorted and followed, his head held low.

Sirius jogged along after them, tail waving jauntily. Remus’ passage had left a scent hanging in the air, assuring Sirius that he had made it through to the shack without incident.

A low growl greeted them as they approached the far end of the tunnel. With teeth barred, the large wolf sniffed experimentally, its hackles lowering as recognition slowly emerged. Peter hung back cautiously, keeping still in the shadows of the larger animals. The wolf took one step towards them, then another.

Not intimidated in the least, Sirius trotted forward to touch noses with his friend, and then lowered into a playful half-crouch and let out a gleeful bark. The wolf's tail flicked, and his entire posture changed. A low bark returned and the tail began to swish in earnest. A moment later, the wolf had tackled the black dog, and the two were wrestling on the dusty floorboards. After a bit Sirius managed to pin Remus. Paw on the wolf’s chest, jaws closed loosely around his throat, he waited for his friend to stop struggling and admit defeat.

Remus wriggled on his back, his tail thumping the floor. A growl rumbled in his throat even as he slowly surrendered. James trotted towards them, playfully head butting Remus as he scrambled to his feet.

Sirius ambled past them to the door, where Peter was hunkered in a nearby corner, large black eyes fixed on the much bigger animals. Sirius gave the rat’s head a quick tap with his nose and then stretched up on his hind legs to turn the knob and release them all into the world.

Nostrils flaring, Remus approached the door cautiously. James strode up behind them, grunting encouragingly. Abruptly, Remus dashed past Sirius out into the untouched snow. A few meters away, he rolled onto his back, then sprang up, shaking the white from his coat.

Sirius plunged after him, sticking his nose into a drift to flick showers of flakes into the air. He used a back leg to kick some into James’ face as he emerged, then darted away before the stag could seek revenge. At the wolf’s side he paused for just a moment before tearing off down the street.

As the three larger creatures began to leave him behind, Peter squeaked furiously. With a snort, James circled back and allowed the rat to climb onto his back, then loped after the eager canines. The landscape was pleasantly deserted as Remus suddenly halted. His nose quivered as his body became still, his attention fixed in one direction.

Sirius skidded to a stop in front of his wolf-friend and moved between him and the direction the distinctly human scent was coming from. He gave Remus a push with his nose, and a bark for good measure, then dashed ahead again before turning back and sinking low to the ground to eye Remus from under his doggish eyebrows.

Immediately, Remus’ focus broke, following Sirius a few paces then stopping again. As he began to turn his head back to its original interest, James ploughed into him, forcing him to take a step sideways to keep his balance. Remus snapped at the air, but his tail began wagging again. Eying Sirius, he dashed after the large dog, who sprinted away in the opposite direction from whatever hapless person was wandering about on the night of the full moon.

Finally Sirius slowed to a steady jog, panting lightly, savoring the sharpness of the cold air. They’d reached the edge of the forest, and he frisked into the trees before running back out, herding his friends along. Any humans foolish enough to venture in here deserved a wolf bite.

The remote expanse of the forest was a haven. Here, it was easier to let Remus explore as his senses appealed. As the moon travelled the inky sky, the hours drifted by uncounted. Intermittently, Remus became agitated in the lulls, beginning at times to bite or scratch at himself until a distraction was provided. Even so, his fur was matted with several small injuries from prior to their rendezvous. Sirius stuck close to him, risking the wolf’s teeth or claws himself in order to spare Moony more pain. All in all it had been a fine night, just as much of an escape as he’d wished for, but as the moon sank he found himself relieved that Remus--the real Remus--would soon be back.

As the horizon grew dusky, Remus' vigor began to wane. Beneath the final fading stars, they returned to the safety of the shack. The wolf slumped to the floor, and, as the moon disappeared into the first greys of dawn, so did the canine shape. Remus caught himself on his hands, bracing himself up with effort. A few fresh marks stood out angrily on his pale skin. Shivering, he accepted the cloak thrown over him, and looked up at his friends with a worn smile. Beside him, Peter knelt and plucked a stick from his hair with dozy cheeriness. Sirius gave his face a quick lick, and then rose up into human form again. Tucking himself under the cloak next to Remus, he asked, “You all right, then?”

Remus nodded, saying nothing. "Right, Moony," James announced, "Let's get you back. Sirius?" The two supported Remus, as they helped him to his feet. Peter collected his scarf from a corner and looped it around Remus' neck, then led down the tunnel as the other three followed behind. With Moony leaning against him, Sirius felt himself relax, letting go of the tension he’d been unconsciously holding for the past hour or so.

Under the last fringes of fading darkness and James' cloak, they returned to the castle unnoticed. The school was not yet stirring to its daily activity as they furtively navigated the dim halls to their dormitory. Wordlessly, Remus collapsed into bed. James grinned, "Another successful adventure, mates," he said hushedly. Peter mumbled an unintelligible reply and began climbing into his own bed, clothes and all. Sirius let his gaze linger on his exhausted friend a moment longer, then reluctantly headed to his side of the room. Someday, he promised himself, he’d be able to fall asleep with Moony in his arms.

III.

The late afternoon sunlight slipping in at the windows found an uncharacteristic lethargy about the Gryffindor common room. In one corner of the quiet room, the three boys sprawled by the fire, satchels and school robes discarded beside them. Peter draped over a chair arm, a disarray of misbuttoned collar and untucked shirt.

"We should be excused from class too, don't you think?" he groaned.

"For what? Sleeping in our beds all night?" James retorted, the slight edge in his tone hinting at his own fatigue.

“Yeah, we’ve got no excuse,” Sirius added, although staying awake in classes had been a struggle for him too. Voice lowered, he continued, “We chose this. He didn’t.”

Glancing between them, Peter nodded in agreement. Suddenly, James sat up a little straighter and ruffled his hair, his attention drawn to the door. Sirius followed his gaze to the expected target. “Hey, Evans,” he called. “Got a few spare moments to help cheer up Potter?”

With a last word to her friend and a touch on the arm, Lily meandered over towards the boys. "Oh, dear," she laughed, tossing her coppery curls, "What's happened now?" Noticing their incomplete group, she frowned thoughtfully.

“Well--” Sirius paused. Sometimes his mouth got ahead of his brain. “Um, go on, tell her, James.”

James shot Sirius a sideways look. Standing up, he invited Lily to join them. "It's nothing, Lils, it's just been a day."

"Can't handle a week of classes?" she teased.

Spreading his hands in appeal, James cracked a grin. "Now, Lils--"

She held up a hand, cutting him off. "It's not as if you are going to tell me, and I probably don't want to know, Mr. Potter." Her expression grew more concerned as she paused, her voice quieting. "But, Remus is alright, yeah?"

“Oh, yes, of course,” Sirius hurried to assure her. He gave an offhand shrug of one shoulder. “Why wouldn’t he be?”

"He's just usually with you," Lily answered slowly, then shrugged in return. She folded her arms, musing. "Well, never mind then," she reassured. "So, have you got any plans, or just going to slug about?"

Peter protested, "We've only just got out of class."

“Why, have you actually missed being a part of our shenanigans?” Sirius shot her a grin.

"Ooh," she laughed, acknowledging his jab, "Maybe, I have. Tempt me, Mr. Black."

He raised an eyebrow. “Fancy an excursion to Hogsmeade?”

James glanced between them a bit surprised, as Lily leaned back, considering. "Well, maybe someday I'll sink to that level of degenerate, but I think we aren't quite there yet," she winked at James. "Besides, at least one of your prefects needs to stand up to you all."

Sirius put on an exaggerated pout. “Just when I was starting to like you, Evans.”

"Such a tragedy!" Lily said brightly. "Well, I'm off the library for arithmancy, if any of you want to come along. Though I'm guessing it's a 'no' from Peter." The drooping head shook in confirmation. "James?"

"Sure!" the reply sounded a little too enthusiastic, then added, "Couldn't hurt." He retrieved his bag, slinging it across one shoulder, and running his fingers to push the dark hair back from his glasses.

Lily winked at Sirius triumphantly. “This isn’t over, Evans,” he returned. “We’ll corrupt you yet.”

As the pair departed, he glumly assessed his options. Remus still passed out, Peter even duller than usual... Well, he knew which one he preferred. “Since we’ve got nothing going on, why don’t you just take a nap here? You look half-asleep already.”

Peter raised a hand in acknowledgement, not lifting his head from the crook of his arm. He showed no sign of abandoning his comfortable slump by the fire. Smiling to himself, half with amusement and half with anticipation, Sirius turned for the stairs.

He slipped into their room cautiously and paused to let his eyes adjust to the curtain-dimmed gloom. Unmoved since morning, Remus lay in bed, pale and still, his hair an untidy splay across the pillow. He had rolled onto his side, his face half hidden. But what was visible showed the fresh scrape, now dried angry and red, across one cheek and down his arm.

Sirius approached softly and brushed back some of Moony’s hair, eyes lingering on the wounds, then circled the bed to slide in behind him, chin tucked into his neck, one arm over his chest. James abandoning them for Lils did have some benefits. Drowsily, Remus shifted in response. Turning his head, he blinked.

"Sirius?" the mild question had little doubt of its answer. With a tired murmur, he pressed his face back into the pillow. "What have I missed? Where are the others?"

“Nothing at all. James swanned off with Evans, and Peter’s snoring in the common room.”

Remus laughed quietly, "Sounds about right." With some effort, he rolled over onto his back. "How bad does it look?"

“Not so bad,” Sirius was quick to reassure him. “We’ll get you some of Madam Pomfrey’s salve and it’ll hardly be noticeable.”

"Good." He turned his face into Sirius' shoulder and let his eyes close again. "That's good."

Sirius closed his own eyes and wrapped an arm around Remus again, trying not to let the moment be tainted by the knowledge that it couldn’t last. He breathed deeply, feeling a bit drowsy himself…

As if on cue, a slow plod of footsteps preceded an equally sluggish turn of the heavy brass doorknob by who could only be Peter. Remus smiled ruefully as Sirius shifted away. The door creaked open as their friend appeared, dragging his robes carelessly behind him. With a nod in their direction, he tossed the robe over the foot of his bed. "How are you feeling, Remus?" he mumbled.

"Not too bad," came the good-natured reply.

“You heading to bed yourself now?” Sirius asked, propping himself up on his elbows.

"We-ell," Peter's internal dilemma stretched the word somewhat, "It is nearly supper."

“Sleep can wait in that case, eh?” Sirius grinned and hopped up. “I bet you could use some supper, Moony.”

 

IV.

Two wingback chairs were pulled opposite around the small chess table. On either side, James and Sirius were sat, studying the board, as their friends looked on. The game seemed evenly matched, both sides having a number of captures lying scattered in front of them. Remus sat on the floor, resting one arm and his chin on Sirius' knee. His complexion had returned to its normal color, and only the faintest pinkish lines seemed to remember the events of a few days ago. Balancing on the arm of James' chair, Peter occupied himself with a box of candy beans from the holidays.

"Mate!" Peter exclaimed, "I think this one's just dirt!" He spat out a brownish lump into his hand and regarded it skeptically.

“Wouldn’t surprise me.” Sirius’ eyes remained on the board. “Box literally says ‘every flavor.’” After a moment, he commanded, “Bishop to F7,” and the black piece slid forward to put James’ king in check.

Leaning forwards with elbows on his knees, James searched the board intently. Engrossed by his reluctance to lose, he hardly noticed Lily until she was nearly standing over them.

"Ooh, bad luck, Potter," she frowned, shaking her head.

"Help me find a way out, Lils," James immediately lightened, although his desire to win far from lessened.

"Isn't that cheating?" Lily leaned on the chair beside him.

"I think it's a bit late for that," Remus laughed, jostling Sirius’ knee.

“Go on, help him out, Evans.” Sirius leaned back with satisfaction. “If you can.”

Lily folded her arms deliberately. "Alright... Knight to D4," she nodded, moving the piece to intercept the check. Remus moved slightly, acknowledging her move with some surprise. "Rook," he suggested mildly.

“Rook it is.” Sirius directed the piece, and it slid one square to the right to threaten James’ king from a different direction.

Lily laughed good naturedly, "Well, there's your problem, James. You aren't playing against just Sirius. I'm not sure even I can get you out of this one." She slid onto the arm of the chair to watch. "Finish with dignity, Potter!"

A few moves later the game was decided. Remus glanced up with a grin at Sirius, as James swallowed his defeat with the consolation of their new company.

"Right! New game," James announced, snatching the box of beans from Peter and plunking it emphatically on the decimated chess board.

Lily made a face. "Oh, those are horrid!"

Sirius grinned and pushed the box in her direction. “You first, Evans.”

"Alright then," she reached for the box, but James pulled it away.

"Nope, you've got to close your eyes and someone else picks."

"James!!" she exclaimed.

"Don't worry, I'll go easy on you," he grinned.

With a pout she closed her eyes and held out a hand. James rummaged through the box, carefully selecting a light honey colored bean and placing it in her hand.

Lily braced herself and popped it in her mouth.

"You've got to describe it," James prompted.

"It's nice!" her expression relaxed, "It's a bit sweet, but not very. And there's just a bit of butter. Is it a tea biscuit?"

"Well done, Lils," James nodded. "Point for Lils. Alright, Sirius, you next?"

“Why not.” Sirius stretched out a hand to wait for whatever abomination James was bound to bestow on him. Deliberating a few moments, James put a solid black bean in Sirius' hand. Rolling his eyes, Sirius dropped the bean onto his tongue. After a moment of chewing and frowning, he offered, “Can’t say I’ve ever tasted it before, but could it be… coal?”

James shook his head acceptingly, "Yeah, near enough, it's charcoal, so I guess point to you, Padfoot. Ok, Remus, you are up."

"Lovely," he shook his head and held out a hand to receive the whitish flecked candy. Upon putting it in his mouth, he made a face. "Surely, no one can be meant to eat this! It's--" he laughed, struggling against the urge to spit it out, "I've no idea, it's awful. It tastes like I've eaten an old rubber glove."

James smirked delightedly, "Give up? Skele-gro, mate."

Remus gagged, "That's horrible. Remind me never to break a bone." Lily looked sympathetic, wincing at the concept.

"Right, now pick one for me," James pushed the box towards Sirius, who fished around inside until he found a pale, translucent one and passed it to his friend.

“See what you make of that.”

James tossed the candy, catching it deftly in his mouth. As he rolled it around on his tongue, he put a hand to his chin mock-thoughtfully. "It's musty, and a bit greasy... Is it Slytherin?" Lily smacked his arm, her expression growing disapproving. James took the hint, "Alright, alright... It seems fishy; is it something like gillyweed?"

“Slytherin’s a good guess,” Sirius answered with a smirk, “but yes, gillyweed it is. Points all around.”

James made an exaggerated gesture of relief. "Better than the alternative," he grinned.

"Give me one," Peter leaned in, nudging James.

"If you weren't keen after the dirt, I can't think your odds are looking much better, Pete," James laughed. "Go on, give him one, Sirius."

With a wicked grin, Sirius tossed a bright green bean at Peter.

As Peter cautiously put it to his lips, James erupted with laughter at the expression it produced. "Having second thoughts, Wormy?" he laughed.

“Come on, mates!" Peter's face was frozen in a grimace of disgust, "What is this?"

"What's it taste like?" Remus refused sympathy.

"I dunno, how is it slimy?!" Peter whined.

"Slimy and green..." Remus summarized casually, as James burst into a new fit of laughter.

Lily cut in sharply, "If you say Slytherin, I'm not playing anymore."

"No, of course not," James straightened his face, "That's not it. C'mon, Peter, what do you think?"

"Goblin toenails?" Peter offered.

“Decent guess, decent,” Sirius replied. “Sure you want to know?”

"I give up," Peter shook his head.

“Troll bogeys,” Sirius announced with satisfaction.

Having just swallowed, Peter immediately gagged with a look of dismay towards Sirius. He wiped his lips with the back if his hand as if that would clear the taste away.

"Alright, my turn," Lily interjected. As James reached for the candy, she added, "I want Sirius to choose." She grinned at Sirius, as over her shoulder James gave him a meaningful look.

With a wink at James, Sirius made a show of sorting through the remaining beans before finally selecting a dingy, pale gray one. “Try this one, Evans.”

Lily took it without hesitation. Immediately, she wrinkled her nose, "Pretty sure it's your room, Sirius!" She laughed, trying not to make a face. "No, wait... Ugh! But it tastes like the boy's dormitories smell. Is that even a flavor?? I don't know, do I want to know?" She swallowed it. "I give up."

Sirius pulled off a tennis shoe and wiggled his toes in her face. “Recognize it now?”

Her mouth opened in amused horror, "Well, I'm not wrong then, am I?" she giggled.

"I think she deserves the point," James put in, supportively, reaching across to pick Sirius' next go. Before he could, Remus intercepted, pulling out a brownish-green one.

Sirius leaned forward and opened his mouth, and the bean dropped onto his tongue. He bit down and winced a bit. “It’s… musty… vegetative…” With a shudder he managed to swallow. “Is it hay?”

"Grass clippings," Remus replied, his smile only slightly apologetic.

“Could’ve been worse, I suppose.” Sirius poked Remus’ leg with his toes before slipping his shoe back on.

His gaze lingered merrily on Sirius, then said, "I guess that means I'm up again?"

"Alright! Let me pick," Lily jostled forwards, glancing over the candy until she selected a bright red one.

Eyes closed, Remus held out his palm. As soon as it dropped into his hand, he raised it slowly to his lips before pausing. "It better not be another Skele-gro," he laughed.

"You'll have to find out, Moony," James pressured, grinning.

Making a face, Remus shook his head, then popped it in his mouth. "Oh, it's blood," he stated without hesitation, still smiling as a shrug dismissed the ease of the answer.

Sirius locked eyes with James, then flicked his gaze to Lily. Her face held a look of surprise--maybe it was just at Remus getting it so quickly, and not his nonchalance? “Ha, you would know that, mate. Never known someone to bite his tongue so often.”

Remus smile stiffened instantly, as he obligatorily laughed along in agreement with the joke. Lily seemed uncertain, but said nothing.

"Well, I dunno about you, Pete," James cut in briskly. "But I'm not sure I want to risk another round myself. Shall we call it a tie between Lils and you, Sirius?"

At once, Peter nodded compliantly, "Yeah, let's do something else."

"Alright," Lily shrugged, slightly confused. "What did you have in mind?"

“Hmm,” Sirius mused, putting on his own air of nonchalance, “what’s an Evans-approved activity that isn’t deathly dull?”

With a glance towards James, Lily grinned at the challenge. "Depends if you think you are up for learning a muggle game or two. No explosions, no chess piece murder, but you'll probably lose anyway," she shrugged. As she pulled out a deck of cards and began to show them, Remus glanced up at Sirius, his face subdued and anxious. Hunching slightly, he settled back against the chair, and quietly began to watch Lily's explanation.

Sirius slid a hand down to surreptitiously pat Moony’s shoulder. It wasn’t much, but it was all he could offer for now.

 

V.

“All right, James,” Sirius declared as the four returned to their room after a late Saturday breakfast, “Evan’s birthday is in two weeks, and we are going to help you plan her the best surprise she’s ever had.” He flopped onto his bed and waited for his friends to join him.

Turning from hanging up his jacket, Remus held up a finger to speak. "I know!" James' tone edged towards manic as he joined Sirius in an emphatic collapse. "I've been wracking my brain over it. What have you got in mind, Padfoot?" Peter darted into the thick of their forming conspiracy, while Remus momentarily returned to putting his things away.

“Welllll… you know her better than me, mate. What does she like? Besides following rules.”

James ruffled a little, "Well, she does a bit," he allowed.

"So probably nothing that involves outright breaking them," Remus suggested, sitting on the edge of the bed nearest Sirius.

"Girls usually like... candy, flowers, going someplace nice, getting attention in front of their friends," Peter listed in no particular order.

"But you aren't going out," Remus cautioned, "So, you'll want to keep it reasonable."

“I feel like it’ll take more than candy and flowers to impress that one. You need something big--you’ve got to show her that you really care.” Sirius’ eyes drifted closed as an idea took shape. “Picture this: birthday evening, after we’ve all indulged in some cake, you ask Lily out for a walk. The stars are bright, the snow sparkling. You stop at the Quidditch pitch, and she looks at you wondering what’s going on--and then fireworks shoot into the sky spelling ‘Happy birthday Evans’. Or, Lily, I mean.”

James sprang up with an enthusiastic clap of his hands, "Padfoot, that's genius! Maybe we could get the whole team to leap out and shout it as well! And--"

A look of uncertainty had replaced Remus' daydreamy smile when the fireworks had been mentioned. Now, at James' amendments, it turned to concern. "Maybe, just fireworks?" he reasoned, "Keep it private, make it about you two."

"I think it sounds fantastic!" Peter chimed in, sitting up eagerly.

“I’m with Moony on this one. You really want us three intruding on your moment? Somehow, I don’t think Evans would appreciate that.”

The idea struck James as foreign, but he relented at the certainty of his friends. "Alright," he agreed. "Just fireworks then. And we'll have just beaten Ravenclaw that week as well! ...Where should we get a cake?"

Sirius gave a roguish raise of his eyebrows. “Could always steal another one.”

With laughter, a consensus was quickly found in agreement of this plan. "Someone should find out her favorite kind," Peter pointed out.

“Hmm.” Sirius’ finger tapped his lips as he thought. “We don’t want her getting suspicious…”

"I'll do it!" Peter volunteered with a sudden grin. He pressed his lips together, proudly secretive.

“You better tell us what you have in mind,” Sirius returned with a laugh. “Can’t have Potter’s grand plan being spoiled over a cake flavor.”

He shook his head, stubbornly. "There are two things I'm an expert on: food and going unnoticed. Leave it to Wormtail." He folded his arms smugly.

“All right…” With a shrug, Sirius glanced at James and Remus to assess their levels of approval.

Both considered this, the latter at length shrugging tentative approval. "Seems fair!" James agreed. "Don't let me down, Wormy, I'm counting on you!"

 

VI.

Red and gold pennants flew opposite blue and bronze across the whitened pitch as a swirl of flurries dusted the crowds shuffling the stands. In obligatory house colors, the trio pushed through the throng of spectators. Despite the chill, there was a buzz of anticipation for the first match of the new year.

As they sought out seats, Remus and Peter trailed Sirius in single file. "You know, you are pretty good on a broom, Sirius," Peter was saying, "Probably could have made the team if you wanted."

"And risk making his family proud of something?" Remus quipped over his shoulder.

“Right, if I became a Quidditch star they might actually approve of me. Can’t have that.” Sirius flashed a grin back at them and led the way to a spot big enough for them all to squeeze in.

Although Peter seemed less convinced of the trade-off, Remus looked affectionately supportive. As they piled onto the wooden bench after each other, they jostled shoulder to shoulder, Remus nudging slightly closer.

"You know, we are really good this year," Peter prattled excitedly. "McGoogs has really been driving them in practice. And I heard talk that the keeper and one of the beaters might go professional after graduation. Of course James probably could too, if he wanted."

Remus turned towards Sirius with a look of mock fascination and a solemn nod of agreement as Peter stood to peer across the pitch.

"They are coming out!" he continued, "Bloody hell, that's some nice broom handling off of Elias Bell, though. He's come along for his first year playing!"

In a flourish of heraldry, the Gryffindor team swept by, a tumult of flurries in their wake and raucous cheers. Joining the chorus, the trio whooped their support, clapping and waving their house colors.

That over with, Sirius settled back to half-watch the game; Quidditch was too crude and inelegant to really be interesting. But James loved it, so here he was in the stands every time. Peter’s enthusiasm was always amusing--for the first 30 minutes or so, at least--and a few hours by Remus’ side were never bad either. And maybe he’d be able to spot Evans in the crowd and report back to James on her reactions.

"James has got the quaffle straight away!" Peter shouted as the game got under way, too enthusiastic to fully commit to sitting.

"That's the good one, right?" Remus asked, mildly.

"How have you gone here for six years, Moony?!" Peter's indignance forced him to turn momentarily from the action. "And you call yourself a wizard!!"

As Peter resumed his devoted spectation, Remus turned to share his silent mirth with Sirius, their shoulders bumping on the narrow bench. Sirius leaned in closer to mutter, “I almost feel like we should leave the two of them alone.”

Remus put a hand to his mouth to hide his laughter, but it was already drowned in the excitement around them. Unflaggingly, Peter had already returned to his commentary, unconcerned with who did or didn't listen to it. Out on the pitch, James was leading the chasers with an easy confidence, shouting plays to his teammates and proving nigh uncatchable for the opposing Ravenclaws. Remus watched contently, pleased enough to see two of his friends in their elements.

Sirius, on the other hand, grew restless after watching another player hit another ball for the millionth time. With a nudge of his shoulder, he asked Remus, “Hey, want to go find Evans, see if she’s suitably impressed with our star chaser?”

"You mind, Peter?" Remus relayed the question to their friend, a bit louder. Without turning from the game, Peter waved them away dismissively. Wrapping another loop in his scarf, he sidled out of the row after Sirius. "How do you mean to find her?" Remus leaned in close, surveying the boisterous crowd.

“Oh, you know we have our ways.” Sirius threw an arm around Remus’ shoulder to guide him toward the stairs. Once on the ground, the cheers of the crowd a bit muffled behind them, they ducked under the bleachers and Sirius pulled a folded piece of parchment from his back pocket. Remus shuffled close to him.

"I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good," they whispered, touching their wands to the paper. Green ink spilled across the blank parchment, trickling outwards into a rough sketch of the castle. Hunching together conspiratorially, they unfolded the pages. Inside, the ink continued to forms halls and pathways, here and there trailing off unfinished. A few scattered charms danced across these areas, some flickering and disappearing as they reached the incomplete edges. Fingers coursed the map to the newly added quidditch pitch. Remus frowned appraisingly of his work, "Not sure if the charms will work yet, but let's give it a try." He touched his wand to it again, "Lily Evans." A few seconds passed, and a small scroll began to crackle faintly into view, floating over the upper western stands.

“Got her,” Sirius said with satisfaction. “I knew it would work, with you the one behind it.” He raised his eyes to give Remus an appreciative smile, different from his usual cocky grin. With a tap of his wand he told he map, “Mischief managed,” and then grasped Remus’ hand for just a few moments before they left the safety of the bleachers.

Wending their way back through the crowd, they quickly spotted Lily just where the map had shown them. “Hey, Evans,” Sirius called over the heads of their classmates, “got room for two more?”

"Well, well, Mr. Black!" Lily folded her arms, "If I didn't know better, I'd say Potter had some competition." Sliding over, she patted the bench beside her. "Hey, Remus," she welcomed with a wave. Lily's attention split comfortably between the game and her new company. As the Gryffindor keeper made a save, she cheered, red and gold ribbons fluttering from her ponytail.

“How’s Potter doing?” Sirius asked, eyes idly wandering over the field in search of his friend. “I forgot to pay attention about 20 minutes ago and haven’t quite started again yet.”

She gestured towards the scoreboard. "He's done alright," she grinned, "Although you can't help wishing he didn't know it."

“Come on, isn’t that just part of his charm?”

"Is that what you came to tell me, Black?" With a skeptical eyebrow, she glanced back to the pitch, "He does have a charm, but don't you dare tell him I said that."

Sirius grinned. “Secret’s safe with me.” He turned back to Remus, leaning an arm on his shoulder as he pointed. “Look at Wormy down there, shouting his little heart out.”

In the rows below, the boy had in fact continued his narration, attracting a handful of younger students who listened and nodded along. "They should let him announce games," Remus commented, "He's really not bad... I think."

As the game wore on, the slow fall of snow began to thicken, piling on the hair and hoods of the onlookers, and capping the tented towers. The far side of the pitch blurred to flashes of color and each time a player whizzed by the crowd, a small blizzard havocked in their wake, eliciting a whoop or a boo depending on the color of their robes. Remus shook the flakes from his hair, while Lily wrung the melting snow from her cheeks with her fingertips. Sirius pushed his own damp strands out of his eyes and hunched closer to Remus for warmth. Somehow, the screen of snow made the game more enjoyable--maybe because now it was no longer his fault that he wasn’t following all the action.

The spectators were no less enthused for the obscured action, but seemed at times to resound louder when glimpses were caught. In the chaos, at last, a spelled flashed upwards in a burst of light, signalling the end of the match. As the scores shuffled to their final position, Gryffindor was victorious. Lily grinned, tossing her head in a flutter of white, "Well, that was luck, otherwise who knows how long we might have been here! I guess our seeker is a keeper. Are you heading back?"

Remus turned inquiringly towards Sirius, his cheeks ruddy from the chill and his chin ducked beneath the edge of his scarf. "We'd better get Peter," he reminded.

“Suppose so, even if we’re going to have to listen to him yammer all the way back,” Sirius answered with a laugh. “Coming with, Evans?”

"I'll meet you back in the common room, once I get dried off," she said, a waving hand catching her eye. "I'm sure Potter will want to relive the game for half of Gryffindor."

“No doubt,” Sirius agreed. “We’ll make sure he waits for you.” He winked at her before hopping down to the next row and then waiting for Remus to follow.

Somewhat against the flow of the crowd, they made their way down to Peter. As soon as he spotted them, he rushed over, aglow in the revelry of victory. "And practically blind!" he was saying. Remus listened, hands in pockets, letting him finish before they turned to go.

“Well, don’t tell Potter,” Sirius said before Peter could plunge in again, “because I made a promise, but Evans told me…” He quirked an eyebrow and paused for effect. “That she finds him charming.”

Peter stopped mid-thought, his mouth opening into an amazed delight. "She-- what?! I knew she did! Oh, this is perfect! But you have to tell him!"

“Nah, mate,” Sirius answered, prodding Peter in the back to get him moving, “I think if we let things play out, she’ll be telling him herself before long.”

Remus brought up the rear, as they descended the quidditch stands and trudged the path back towards the castle. By the time they returned to the dormitories, they were well aware of the icy chill that had settled in their clothes. Leaving a trail of melting clumps behind them, they darted up to their room to peel off the damp layers.

"That was a game!" Peter had returned to his recapitulation. "And the way Prongs was playing, if it had gone on much longer, it wouldn't have mattered who caught the snitch," he added proudly. There was a thoughtful pause and he grinned to himself, "Lily Evans."

Interrupting this line of thought, a damp jumper wrapped around his face from Remus' side of the bed. "Don't you dare spill, Peter!" he warned.

An undaunted smirk emerged from beneath the garment as he tossed it back. "I know! But guess what? I know what her favorite cake is!" He folded his arms triumphantly. "Guess."

“Hmm, I’d say plain vanilla with no icing,” Sirius replied, scrubbing at his hair with a towel. It wasn’t as fun to mock Evans when she wasn’t there--but it was still fun enough.

"Wrong," Peter gloated, "Guess, Moony?"

"I don't know, carrot?"

"Wrong again!" he beamed, "Caramel toffee!"

“Well, I have to admit I’m impressed,” Sirius said with a nod of approval. “And you’re sure she doesn’t suspect anything?”

"Not a thing," Peter replied smugly. He tugged a dry shirt over his head, quite content with his success.

For a moment, Remus considered this, then shrugged. "Well, she didn't seem to. Well done then, Pete. Seems like you've come through." He glanced towards Sirius, looking for confirmation but unable to find any reason to doubt.

Sirius shrugged in agreement--apparently, Peter really had pulled it off. “Wait’ll we tell Prongs. He’ll be over the moon.”

Basking in the praise, he fairly danced towards the door. "He'll be coming back with the team soon," he announced, "I'm gonna go wait in the common room!"

Remus laughed quietly as the door slammed. Retrieving the jumper from the floor, he lay it over a chair to dry and began rummaging for another one. "Pete's having a fine day," he mused.

“A success and a quidditch game. Doesn’t happen often.” Sirius said it mostly for Remus’ reaction, shucking off his wet t-shirt and pulling on a fresh one.

Without turning, Remus grinned at the mild jab, "So he should enjoy it." He pulled a lumpy, folded knit from the dresser and slid into it. "I guess we'd better join the festivities?"

“I guess,” Sirius answered, but instead of heading for the door, he crept up behind Remus to wrap his arms around him. “Eventually.”

 

VII.

Smoothing a page in the heavy book, Remus bent forward to scrawl a note in the margin. The quill scritched against the paper, jotting a narrow looped script before it was returned to the bedside table. In typical fashion, he leaned over his reading, folded to an unpretentious hunch that left ample room for the companion sprawling at the foot of his bed. Between them, the map splayed out in rumpled peaks and valleys, its green calligraphy meandering placidly.

Now that Remus was engrossed in his studies, Sirius glanced around for something to entertain himself. On the nearby bed, Peter was levitating playing cards to build a house in the air--or trying to, at any rate. Under the pretense of glancing at the map, Sirius shifted and subtly withdrew his wand, flicking it at the cards to pull three of them over to circle Remus’ head like a crown.

Remus glanced up with a comment on his text, when he noticed the bemused Sirius watching him. "What?" his tone hinted resignation to the joke. From the ruins of his card house, Peter snickered.

“Oh, nothing. What were you going to say?” Sirius’ camera sat on the floor nearby. He just need a minute more...

Remus shrugged, "Just thought it was interesting about dementors: It's not happy thoughts that resist them--they drain those--it's focusing on something else... like an obsession. Well, there are other ways, too," he added, "I wouldn't like to have test any of them."

“So it’s like, if you forget they exist, they can’t bother you?” The camera rose into the air behind Remus until it also hovered above his head.

"I dunno if anyone could manage that, but they seem to only really be drawn to a person's happiness or sadness," Remus checked his notes. "Maybe they don't know what to do with anything else? They never bother with animals."

“Should’ve led with that--means I’ll be covered if I ever meet one.” Sirius let one of the cards drop slightly to brush against Remus’ hair. When Remus turned his gaze upward, the camera button clicked down, and Sirius laughed with triumph.

With good-natured annoyance, Remus swatted away the floating cards. "Give me that!" he held out a hand for the photograph that Sirius had snatched up. Grinning, Sirius leaned away to study it, letting the camera drop to the bed. A bit fuzzy, but it had captured Remus’ surprised frown, as well as the look in his eyes that said he just knew this was Sirius’ doing.

“I’m going to treasure it forever,” he declared, turning it for Remus to see but still keeping it out of his reach.

Leaning to look at it, Remus groaned, "I'm certain you will." Peter hurried to peep over Sirius' shoulder, chortling at the result of his antics. "Very pretty, Moony," he teased. Remus rolled his eyes and bent back over his textbook.

After slipping the photo into a pocket, Sirius bent over the map. “Let’s see where Evans and Prongs have got to.”

Peter joined him in crowding over the parchment. The shaky scrolls bearing the names in question were currently stationary. Skeptically, Peter prodded them with his wand to no effect. "Are you certain its working?"

“Do you normally run around in circles while watching fireworks?” Sirius glanced at Remus and rolled his eyes. “As long as they’re still there and together, I’d say it must be going well.” He flopped back on the bed and whisked the three playing cards into the air again, pulling in the rest of the deck to form a small whirlwind between the two beds. “Almost wish they’d get it over with though so we could hear about it.”

"Mm-hm," Remus agreed without lifting his eyes, "Well, there's still cake."

“Cake!” Sirius jumped up, and all the cards collapsed to the floor. A piece lifted onto a plate and then flew toward him from the table across the room. “You two want any?” In reply, Remus inclined forward, opening his mouth for Sirius to share a bite. When the cake reached him, Sirius broke a piece off and dropped it in before taking a bite of his own. “Wormy?” he asked through the mouthful.

Peter was already retrieving his own unashamedly sizable piece and piled onto the bed with them. "Mm!" he tapped the map urgently as he swallowed, "They are moving!"

Sirius squinted down at the two small scrolls, which were indeed departing the quidditch pitch at a leisurely pace. “Finally!”

Soon enough, footsteps rang out on the stairs, and the door burst open. Grinning with triumphant exuberance, James swept into the room. "Well, mates," he commanded their attention, letting the address hang in the air as he awaited response.

Normally Sirius would have let Peter be the first to blurt out the question, but this time he had no shame. “Well, yourself. Going to tell us how it went, or just stand there smiling all night?”

"I think he's still trying to decide," Remus assessed.

James' smile only widened at the both of them. "It went off like a charm! Lils loved it! Aaaaand what's more, she agreed to go out with yours truly, to Hogsmeade, in juuust about two weeks." He winked roguishly.

Immediately making the calculation, Remus clapped approvingly, exchanging a knowing nod with Sirius.

Sirius grinned and slapped James on the back. “I knew it! Excellent work, Prongs.”

 

**~ February 1977 ~**

I.

The lower halls flickered with torchlight, casting spidery shadows of the two figures slowly traversing its length. Occasionally, they stopped, inspecting some detail or tapping the stones with their wands. Then, Remus scratched a few notes in his reliable script, and they continued. It took some time to reach the bend. "Go right," he consulted their sprawling mass of parchment, "And we can head up towards the Astronomy tower." The direction he suggested trailed off into one of the many gaps that the green ink had yet to chronicle.

Sirius led the way forward, making sure Remus was close behind him. Charting the vastness of Hogwarts seemed a never-ending task, but he didn’t particularly mind. “Think anyone else ever comes down here?”

Trailing a finger along one wall, Remus rubbed the thin dust between his fingers. "Not often, unless Filch has gone for a particular aesthetic. I wonder what it was originally built for?"

“Who even knows with this place. Maybe it was built for people like us, who look beyond the beaten path.”

"Is that what we are doing? I thought it was trespassing." Remus broke into a mild grin, as he bumped a shoulder against Sirius.

“You just had to ruin my romantic notion,” Sirius answered with an exaggerated sigh, bumping Remus back.

"Sirius Black? Romantic?" he teased, his gaze lingering fondly.

"Only in select company." Sirius grinned back and leaned in to plant a quick kiss on Moony's lips before continuing on.

"Alright..." Shyly aglow, he trailed after Sirius.

The passageway continued straight on for some time before terminating at a narrow spiral staircase. Sirius took a seat on the bottom step, waiting for Remus to finish his additions to the map. Remus settled beside Sirius on the worn stone, balancing parchment and quill across his knees. A faint color still hovered pleasantly in his expression as he pressed his shoulder against Sirius'.

"Alright," he said through the quill in his teeth, "That should about do it." Folding the notes into his bag, he wrapped the quill in a handkerchief and stowed it as well. Placing both hands on his satchel-strap, he looked back to Sirius, ready.

Getting to his feet, Sirius held out a hand to pull Moony up. “Will be nice to get some fresh air after this.”

Following the rope up the steep spiral, they emerged into the lofty stillness of the Astronomy Tower. In soft rhythm, Remus finished his count of the steps, fumbling with his notes as he jotted the number. Centered in the chamber, the astrolabe was dusted from some prior gust, but the delicate snow that laced the iron was now undisturbed by any breath. From here, the castle grounds seemed to belong to another world, muffled beneath a hazy veil. Remus leaned on the railing alongside Sirius, watching tiny dashes of color dart silently below.

Sirius let the silence linger, simply enjoying Remus’ presence next to him, no one around to disturb their peace. Eventually, he slid an arm around Remus’ shoulders. “Getting cold yet?”

"No," Remus shifted closer, "It's nice."

Sirius leaned his head against Remus’. “It is.”

This couldn’t last forever, but in that moment he pretended that it would--no fear of discovery or judgment, just the two of them together, where they belonged. Turning towards him, Remus shyly tugged at the lapel of Sirius' robe. Their foreheads touched. A smile flickered across Remus' lips, his eyes fixed where he gently smoothed the fabric again. Sirius cupped Remus’ face in his hands and kissed him. Inclining to him, Remus' arms encircled him, as their lips met in soft exchanges.

Finally Sirius broke away, although it was too soon; it was always too soon. But the sun was sinking, the chill growing sharper, and Peter and James would be wondering where they’d got to. “Suppose we should be heading back,” he admitted softly, still nose-to-nose with Remus, running a hand through his hair.

Remus wore a wistful flush as he nodded agreement. Quietly, he leaned in, appealing a final kiss. As they parted, he found Sirius' hand and laced their fingers for a moment while they crossed the tower chamber. Then came the twisting descent, while, behind them, the winter sun dipped low on the horizon.

Retracing their steps, they slipped back into the regularly-frequented halls unnoticed and made their way to the common room. As they entered, Peter bolted upright in the chair with a welcoming smile. Without disturbing his comfortable slump, James bestowed a grin of acknowledgement. "Where've you been?" he flicked his wand idly in their direction.

“You know, just working on our never-ending project,” Sirius answered airily. “Made some good progress.”

"Brilliant!" James replied, although his lack of movement somewhat undermined the appraisal. "Must have gotten a lot done?"

"Yeah," Peter put in, "Been waiting for you to head down to supper."

"Oh," Remus apologized, "Didn't mean for that!"

"No worries, Moony!" James shrugged, tapping the arms of his chair in alternating rhythms. "Maybe you should just take Pete next time. I think Padfoot has been slowing you down." With a heave, he pulled himself to his feet. "Supper, mates?"

Sirius ignored the dig, more concerned with whether James’ suggestion would actually be implemented next time. He exchanged a glance with Remus as they followed James out. The replying expression verged strongly on guilty as Remus ducked his head and brought up the rear, but it was not altogether sorry.

 

II.

The weekend promised as much ambivalent snow as had the week preceding it, but an anticipatory buzz began flutter amongst the students nonetheless. Strictly speaking, the holiday in question occurred on the following Monday, and so this precious free time took its place honorarily. Barely any new snow had fallen of late, and they were now squarely in the barren depths of the season. And so, the day arrived as a welcome diversion to most. Bright Saturday morning found many amorous pairs bound for Hogsmeade, while uncoupled others trickled in their wake, unwilling to be deprived of the amusement merely for having no stake in the festivities.

Among these were Sirius and Remus, joining the flow like any other two friends who lacked dates. So far Sirius hadn’t been able to decide what, if anything, the holiday meant for them. It was stupid, wasn’t it, ridiculous, something for other people--but then, he still couldn’t help a sneaking suspicion that surprising Moony with a gift or some such gesture would bring on that blush and shy smile that melted his heart every time. So it was a toss-up, really. At least he had all day to ponder it.

Remus had his scarf looped twice, the worn ends swaying unevenly. Sirius had neglected to announce a plan and Remus hadn't asked, but in the absence of both James and Peter, it seemed wasteful to forego the outing. They walked side by side, Remus' hands tucked into his pockets, his posture a slight hunch that made his height equal to Sirius.

It was a bit awkward, somehow, the two of them out together without their other friends—still not free, and lacking the additional company that would make that fact less burdensome. “Suppose Evans will still find Prongs charming after a whole day with him?” Sirius finally asked. “I’m a bit worried she’ll like him best in small doses.”

"She might as well know what she's in for," a smile hinted at the thought, but Remus added optimistically, "I'm sure Prongs'll come through." He glanced at Sirius who seemed lost without the complement of their group, and frowned thoughtfully. Removing one hand from his pocket, he gave Sirius a gentle, arms-length shove. "I suppose we might run into them and find out," Remus suggested.

“We just might.” Sirius’ old grin was back. “And I’ve got just the way to do it without anyone noticing.” In his eagerness, he reached for Remus’ hand to pull him along, but caught himself and stopped short, dropping his arm and glancing around to see if anyone had noticed.

"Right," Remus immediately lengthened his stride, propelling them along without missing a beat. "So, what's this plan then?" he invited without so much as a cautious admonition.

“Right,” Sirius echoed. “I’ll put on my disguise”--punctuated with a smirk and a wink--“scout them out, and report back to you.”

"Sirius!" Remus' gaze snapped from the unoccupied hand to the devious grin. "Oh, alright," he relented, keeping his voice low, "Just be careful."

“Aren’t I always careful?” Sirius tossed over his shoulder with a raise of his eyebrows as he veered off toward a sidestreet. “Come on, I’ve just got to find a safe spot…”

"You're really not," Remus said to himself, shaking his head and following in tow.

In a slim alleyway where the back walls of two buildings leaned close together, Sirius grabbed Remus’ hands and kissed him hard. “I’ll be back,” he whispered, before shrinking down into dog form and trotting off, but not without one more glance back.

Meandering through the streets as a dog during the day, with people around, was a new experience, but no one took particular notice of him. Heading toward the center of town, it wasn’t long before he picked up James’ scent. It wandered from one side of the street to the other, in and out of shops, but finally ended at Honeydukes. Stopping by the large front window, he caught a glimpse of his targets within, standing over a tray of candy but engaged with each other instead of the wares.

Framed in the frosted panes, Lily leaned away from James, laughing as he teased her with a piece of toffee. Grabbing his arm, she pulled him along, out of view of the window. A few moments later, they emerged from the shop, a paper bag tucked under one arm. Lily arranged her scarf as they spilled back onto the snowy road, laughing over her shoulder at some shared joke.

Sirius only had one minuscule moment of hesitation before he bounded after them, running ahead to turn and stop in a playful bow, tail wagging. Immediately, recognition flickered across James' expression, but already Lily was bending down towards the canine.

"Where did you come from?" she asked, scritching her fingers into the shaggy fur, as James watched in chagrin. Sirius sank to the ground, ears dropping back, and leaned into the head scratch while flicking his eyes toward James. Whatever this earned him later, it was so worth it.

"You are a good boy! Yes, you are," Lily grinned, ruffling his ears with both hands.

"C'mon, Lils," James encouraged, tweaking her shoulder.

"But, James, look at him!" she cupped the hairy muzzle and turned it towards him.

"Looks kinda mangy to me," he frowned.

Lily gasped. "You monster!" she laughed and gave the dog a final pat. After a quick lick of her hand, Sirius sauntered past them on down the street, turning once to see James shaking his head at him. He winked back and then vanished around the side of a building. Once out of view of people or windows, he let his body lapse back into human Sirius, and then strolled out onto the main street again. Lily and James were gone, as he had hoped, and he ducked into Honeydukes.

The place was a bit crowded, naturally, and suddenly Sirius realized he was going to have witnesses.

"Hello, Sirius," the voice behind him shaped a familiar proper tone, "Are you here by yourself?" Regulus' prim expression was tinged with surprise. Noticing Sirius' purpose, he added, "For someone in particular?"

Rolling his eyes--of course his brother would be here--Sirius answered with a scoff, “What do you think? Do I seem like the candy-buying type? I’m getting something for myself, thank you very much.”

Indifferently, Regulus shrugged, "Suit yourself." Plucking a sugar quill from the jar beside them, he turned and walked away.

Straightening his shoulders, Sirius turned his back on his brother and glanced around. There was the chocolate--cauldrons, wands, skeletons… He inserted himself between two other students at the display and folded his arms. He could make it a joke, get the frogs, or be a bit nicer…

Well, why not both. With a box of frogs under one arm and two chocolate bars in the other hand, he made his way to the counter. “Treating myself today,” he announced as he set them down.

Sitting in Madam Puddifoot's, Remus had settled at the most unobtrusive table. His hands encircled the mug of tea, enjoying the warmth curling up towards his face. Quietly, he stared into the steaming liquid, occasionally glancing out the window to the bustling street. A smile hesitated as he watched the passersby drift in carefree clusters.

Outside, Sirius had easily discovered where Remus had gotten to. He caught his eye through the window and gave him a wave before striding in. “Success!” he declared as he dropped into the opposite chair. He couldn’t help a laugh as he recalled the incident. “Better than we could’ve dreamed.” Glancing around at the other customers, he lowered his voice. “I’ll have to give you the details later, but to suffice it to say, they’re having a good time, and I managed to have some fun too. Also--” He lifted the box of frogs from his lap to set it on the table between them. “Fancy a frog?”

Visibly brightened, a smile had spread widely as Remus leaned forward to listen. Reaching for the candy, he laughed appreciatively, "Chocolate frogs, hm? You know it comes in forms that don't try to escape?"

“But where’s the fun in that?” As he spoke, Sirius popped open one of the small boxes, aiming it toward Remus’ face.

As the frog flopped from its box, it landed on the rim of Remus' mug, tipping forward with a small splash. Good-naturedly, he fished it out with a spoon, setting it on a napkin as the last of the charm expired. Sirius snickered a bit sheepishly. “Tea-flavored chocolate, even better?”

"Maybe?" Remus shrugged, popping the quieted frog into his mouth with a grin. "Not bad," he appraised.

Sirius ordered his own tea and they sat enjoying the frogs until one, perhaps charmed more strongly than its fellows, leapt onto their neighbors’ table and sent a cup crashing to the floor. Under Madam Puddifoot's disapproving gaze, they left a generous tip and then hastened out.

As soon as the door was closed behind them, Sirius let loose his pent-up laughter. “Did you see their faces? Sitting all close, having a romantic moment, and suddenly there’s a frog on the table.”

Remus chuckled as they evacuated the tea shop stoop. Glancing behind them, he jostled against Sirius as they tramped out into the snowy lane.

“So, want to hear about my previous adventure?” Sirius asked now that they weren’t surrounded by potential eavesdroppers. As they wandered toward The Three Broomsticks, he filled Remus in on the story. When they ducked into the pub they found it packed with their classmates, but an open table remained at the back. Butterbeer ordered, Sirius settled in to relax for a bit, shenanigans over for the time being.

Remus leaned onto the heavy wooden table opposite Sirius, a butterbeer resting between his palms. Despite the hubbub, the dull glow of the corner table offered a welcome respite. Contentedly, Remus sipped his mug, his eyes occasionally wandering the crowds for familiar faces, but always returning to Sirius.

The door jangled open, and two familiar figures burst in with an unassuaged energy. As she scanned the overfilled tables, Lily's gaze discovered their table across the pub. Grabbing James' hand to pull him in tow, she threaded her way over to them. Her cheeks were flushed with her usual energy, "Hello, boys! Do you two mind if we join you?" She looked between the both of them, politely hesitating to impose.

“Not at all!” Sirius hopped up to slide in next to Remus, leaving the opposite bench free for James and Lily. “Having a good day so far?” He grinned pointedly at James.

As they shuffled onto the open bench, James eyed Sirius scathingly. "Yes!" Lily replied brightly, tossing a playful smile at James. "What about you two?"

“Oh, it’s been all right,” Sirius answered with a shrug, although he was unable to entirely keep the satisfaction out of his tone. “Got kicked out of Puddifoot’s for having too much fun with some chocolate frogs. I’m sure you two haven’t done anything that exciting.” Remus corroborated with a sheepish delight, nodding behind his mug.

Lily looked at James approvingly. "No, nothing like that, thank goodness," she agreed, "Just visited the shops, and saw this adorable dog." She burst out laughing as James made an involuntary pained expression. "James is dead against the poor thing," she explained, shaking her head, "I can't understand why."

"Lils!" James protested, stealthily glaring towards Sirius. "Look, the dog is 'fine.' Can we drop it?"

"No, now I know your darkest secret," she asserted with mock gravity, "James Dog-hater Potter." James began to roll his eyes, but his expression instantly transformed as Lily leaned over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll get us some drinks," she was already getting up from the bench, "And you are right, the dog did smell a bit." As she tripped off, Remus quietly choked on a sip of butterbeer.

At Lily’s remark, Sirius’ barely-contained mirth had instantly become horror. “Do I really smell?” he hissed as soon as she was gone, hands planted on the table as he glanced from James to Remus.

At Sirius' consternation, James' snicker became an unabashed roar. Even Remus began to chuckle, "Like a wet dog, Sirius. Surely I tell you once a week."

"Nobody trusts your nose, Moony," James said, breathless.

“I thought that was a joke,” Sirius confirmed. He twisted his head to sniff his shoulder. “Well, I don’t smell anything--it’s fine right now, right? I mean, it wouldn’t make sense for me to smell in human form anyway. How would that even work?”

"You tell me, Padfoot," James offered no mercy in the triumph of his revenge, redoubling his amusement at Sirius' remarks. Remus grinned, nudging Sirius under the table with his knee. As Lily returned, laughter hushed, although the joke lingered in glances exchanged.

Sirius took a long swallow of butterbeer. How revolting. Maybe he could find an anti-stink spell… “So, what are your plans for the rest of the day?” he asked with a nod at James and Lily, as if he hadn’t just experienced the greatest humiliation of his life.

Lily slid one mug across to James, looking at each of them. "Not sure," James did his utmost to quell his satisfaction, "What do you fancy, Lils?" Remus cast a sidelong expression to Sirius at that answer.

Thoughtfully, she took a sip, "Well, how long did you two mean to stay out?" She gestured the question back across the table. "We could tag along and then all head back to Hogwarts, but I don't want to cut in on your plans?" James gave Lily an odd look as she took another sip.

“Oh, we’ve got no plans,” Sirius answered with a quick shrug. “Just seeing where the day takes us.”

Lily ignored James, nodding slowly. Turning the look towards Remus, she found it unreturned as he intently regarded his butterbeer. "Great!" James broke in, enthusiastic for the additional company. "Let's nip by Zonko's! We should get something so Wormy doesn't feel left out."

 

III.

The afternoon had drifted to a lull in its last hours, and four had returned from mapping to laze in the golden haven of the dormitories. James' narration of his own date the day prior had somehow slipped into vehement denial of Peter's. Irritably, the smaller boy folded his arms, "You are impossible, I don't know why I bother," he rolled his eyes. "I did have a date, and that's that."

"And so did Sirius and Remus," James nettled. Peter fumed, only encouraging the teasing. "Look next time, let's make it a double date and then we'll know it's real."

"Alright!" Peter exclaimed in relief, his tone indicating no difficulty with this criteria, "Honestly..!" Laughing, James leaned back into the chair, content with his success.

Thoughtfully, Remus sat against the leg of an armchair, staring over the rim of his mug towards the common room fireplace. The lively argument seemed to escape his notice, his attention fixed to an indistinct point in space.

Sirius had joined in James’ teasing as usual, but let James do the majority of the work. He still had two bloody chocolate bars in his pocket from yesterday, having had no opportunity to bestow them on Remus yet. Now they probably smelled like dog.

He studied Remus’ profile, outlined against the crackling flames. He’d been quiet today, and Sirius wished he knew what he was thinking. He bumped Remus’ shoulder with his knee and rolled his eyes toward Peter, who was already trying to make plans with James for the promised double date.

Lifting his head, Remus wore an absent expression. The briefest of smiles shaped his lips as he followed Sirius' gaze, then his own began meandering back towards his tea.

Sirius’ fingers tapped the chair arm. Any minute now James would challenge him to a chess match, but he wasn’t in the mood tonight. “Seen Evans at all today?” he asked when the conversation between the other two hit a lull.

"Haven't really," James pondered. "Why do you say?"

“Well, you want to keep things going, right? Don’t want her to think you’ve forgotten her. Maybe you should check in.”

A conflict crossed his face. "No, you are right. But I don't want you thinking that you mates don't matter." James ruffled his hair, glancing around at them fondly. "Unless you are trying to get rid of me," he winked, grinning at his own joke.

Sirius laughed along. “Never, Prongs. Just don’t want you neglecting your girlfriend for us.”

"Fair point, Padfoot," James nodded, lurching to his feet from the deep slouch of the wingback, "Well, I've had about enough of you lumps anyway." He nudged the flopped Peter with a toe as he stepped over him. "Shouldn't you allegedly be doing the same, Wormy?"

Peter grumbled an inarticulate protest. "Oh, bugger off. You've no idea how these things work," he waved dismissively, "I give you and Evans a month." Instead of dignifying it with a retort, James laughed, his snicker continuing as he disappeared to the hallway.

Sirius eyed Peter’s lounging form; he looked pretty settled… “Hey, Moony.” He tapped Remus’ shoulder. “Remember that book you needed from the library? Want to head down and find it before it gets too late?”

The mug lowered, its contents having cooled sometime ago. "Book?" Remus repeated uncertainly at first, "Yes, alright." Cooperatively, he set the tea aside on the hearth and got to his feet. Peter hadn't budged, watching them halfheartedly with little evident intent to change that.

“Be back in a bit, Wormy,” Sirius said as he stepped around his prone friend. And then, finally, he and Remus were free.

Outside a bathroom, Sirius made Remus wait while he ducked into a stall to check the map. His destination was clear—perfect. “So, you know we’re not really going to the library?” he asked as he rejoined Remus.

"I had wondered," Remus half-smiled, "Where did you mean to go?"

“You’ll see.” Sirius elbowed him and flashed a grin, then led them onward, climbing up until they’d reached the top of the astronomy tower. As soon as the door closed behind them, he grabbed Remus’ hand. “Close your eyes.” When Remus complied, he let go and pulled out a chocolate bar. “Keep them closed…” He snapped a piece off and instructed, “Now open your mouth,” and then set the square on Remus’ tongue.

At the beloved taste, Remus melted into a comforted smile. As his eyes opened to meet Sirius', they shared the same grateful warmth. "You didn't have to," he began softly.

"I wanted to," Sirius cut in, matching Remus’ smile. "Here's the rest." He pressed the chocolate bar into Remus’ hand. "Oh, and this one, too," reaching into his pocket for the second.

"What--?" Remus fumbled to accept the candy suddenly thrust at him. "Sirius," he protested, with a small laugh, then his tone quieted, "Thank you." Still holding the chocolate bars, he threw his arms around Sirius' shoulders.

Sirius hugged him back, tightly, and then shifted his head so that their lips met. He kissed Remus deeply, hungrily, with all the pent-up longing of the last two days.

Some time later found them side by side at the railing, an arm around each, heads leaned together. “I wish…” Sirius said softly, so quiet it was barely audible, and he let it trail off into silence.

As the words drifted away, Remus tilted his head back onto Sirius' shoulder. Lacing their fingers together, he pulled the arm closer around him. His wistful smile quietly understood.

“Also,” Sirius mumbled into Moony’s hair, “I’m sorry I smell like a dog.”

"Sirius," Remus appealed, an unexpected laugh breaking his lips. "Don't take it so hard!" he nudged Sirius playfully, pressing his cheek into him, "...I don't hate it."

“Do you like it?” Sirius pulled back to look at Remus and poke his arm. “Is this your secret fetish?”

"What?" Remus jerked away in protest. "No! it's just... Shut up, I was being nice..."

“Sure, Moony, sure.” Sirius smirked at him and pressed his face into his neck. “You loooove it.”

Remus pushed him away, smiling in spite of it. "Honestly!" he rolled his eyes. In response, Sirius kissed him again. Remus relented at the irresistible glint in the grey eyes. As they tumbled to the floor, he buried his fingers in the dark locks above him. Sometime later, the pair returned to the dormitories, sheepishly exuberant and rather more unkempt than usual.

 

**~ March 1977 ~**

I.

The moon was high in its arc among the speckled stars. Although the sky remained crystalline, the nights had begun to shake their chill for the thaw of spring. It had been a quiet night, and the four had strayed comfortably amongst the silver streaks and shadows. Remus had been content to be shepherded easily enough, and James had encouraged a farther foray than they often ventured. The awakening scents of the season's advent teased a pleasant escapade for all.

With elegant strides, the stag paced the mottled dim, flanked alternately by the two canines. He tossed his head, snorting occasionally, or stamping impatiently at their antics. Peter's rodent form darted between the steady hooves, chattering as the wolf bounded playfully between his companions. Dog-Sirius sometimes wrestled his wolf friend, rolling in the snow, and other times veered off to trail a scent before returning to the group. Everything was so simple on these nights, all the complications of being human temporarily forgotten.

Remus had tackled Sirius, standing over him and growling as he snapped playfully at the black fur. With another irritated whuff, James loped back to encourage them along. Suddenly, the wolf stopped. His head shot straight up, nostrils quivering. As his head hunched down, the hackles began to rise along his shoulders. The stag butted into the wolf's flank, but not even a irritable snap responded. Sirius squirmed back onto his feet and gave the wolf’s shoulder a shove with his head, also to no avail. Then, he bolted. James whirled to follow, legs splayed as he abruptly changed direction. Sirius raced after them, catching the scent now, some fucking fool out in the middle of the fucking night. But Remus was not going to become a murderer, dammit.

Less than carefully, the stag and dog charged in the wake of their friend, the shriek of Peter's concern fading behind than. As they caught up to Remus, he had crouched low to the ground near the edge of the woods. He cast a snarl over his shoulder as they approached, interfering with his hunt.

Pausing, Sirius shot a quick, fearful glance at James. Until now, they’d always been able to distract Remus before it came to this. He stepped forward, head ducked in a submissive posture, eyes locked on the creature that his friend had become. James circled opposite, a strangled nicker sounding as he eyed Sirius' negotiations. The wolf bared his teeth, snapping out in warning, but his attention was still fixed on his mark. He crept forwards.

There was only one thing Sirius could think to do, and it was probably one of the most foolish ideas he’d ever had, but he pushed that thought aside. Scrambling back from Remus, he rose up into human form again. “Hey! Wolf-boy!”

The wolf froze, mid-stride, his gaze locking to Sirius. A growl rumbled from the monster's throat as it began a closing circle around its new prey. "Remus John Lupin, you’re a terrible prefect!" James interjected from opposite, wand ready, his face pale but grim.

“Don’t hurt him!” Sirius implored James, flinging up a warning hand. “We just need to draw him far enough away.” He took another step back, heart racing as he kept his eyes on the wolf.

James grit his teeth, as the wolf looked between them and back to Sirius. The grey muzzle pulled back in a snarl, teeth parting slightly. One paw stepped forward, than another, but each quickening stride sank farther into a crouch. "Sorry, mates," A spell flashed out from James' wand, lashing the wolf across the flank. Wand leveled, he crossed to intercept the direction of the unknown human, as the wolf staggered to collect himself.

“Fuck!” Sirius shouted. “Bloody hell, Prongs!” He dropped back into dog form and raced to the wolf’s side, pushing him to the ground.

Stunned and surprised, the wolf thrashed to throw Sirius off. "Peter, stay back!" James yelled. Standing at the edge of the clearing, a look of horror paralysed the boy's face. Wrenching himself free, the wolf locked gaze with the newcomer momentarily. James fired another spell, this time cracking across the ground at the wolf's paws, cutting him off. With an angry bark, the wolf turned and fled, this time headed deeper into the forest.

Fallen on his side, Sirius lay still for a moment, panting, but then he scrambled to his feet and lit off after Remus. With a shared look, James and Peter followed. The wooded shadows began fading to grey as the stars retired from their vigil. As the murky color of daylight began to slowly return to the world, the haggard trio searched the forest desperately, Sirius catching the wolf’s trail at times only to lose it again amidst the layers of other animal scents.

They fanned out, calling his name as they stumbled through the dead leaves of last season. He was lying on his side, arms curled up to his face. Sticks and brambles tangled his hair, while dirt and blood streaked his body, which shook in breathless sobs.

Sirius bolted toward him and collapsed into human form at his side, tears welling in his own eyes. “Moony…” His voice broke as he lay a gentle hand on his friend’s shoulder. Remus barely lifted his head, panic written in the fresh slashes and trails of tears.

James and Peter were not far behind. Throwing his cloak over Remus, James scanned the area for sign of anyone else, while Peter dropped to his knees beside them. "Mate," Peter breathed sorrowfully, trying to tuck the cloak around his shoulder. Remus clutched at it, drawing his legs underneath him and unsteadily pushing himself up on one elbow.

“We have to get him back,” Sirius said, looking from James to Peter. “Moony… do you think you can walk?”

Nodding, Remus clung to Sirius as he and Peter steadied him upright. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he repeated. Peter patted him gently, glancing between the other two with concern. "I can carry him," James cut in.

“Good,” Sirius answered curtly, and helped lift Remus onto James’ back, pressing a hand against his shoulder before stepping away to lead the long trudge back toward Hogwarts.

In a spread line, they marched in somber silence back to the shack. There was little to say, and each face wore the dejected exhaustion of the night. The sun had crested the morning and the dormitory was squarely in the silence of weekend morning, by the time they finally collapsed back into their room. James said nothing, his expression joylessly unflinching as he set Remus down and retreated to his side of the room. Carefully, Peter helped arrange the pillows, removing debris from the tangled greyish-brown hair. Remus had sunk into an expressionless silence, but was gradually beginning to surrender to his fatigue. Sirius hovered over him, feeling powerless. “I’ll get him some water,” he blurted, and fled the room.

In the bathroom, he splashed water on his face and then stared at himself in the mirror. His hair was wild, his eyes circled in shadows, his face drained of color. He gripped the sink and squeezed his eyes shut. How had everything gone so wrong?

He remembered to bring a cup of water back to the room, where his friends still lingered in the room with a worn-out aimlessness. Curled up on his bed, Peter was uncharacteristically turned towards the rest of the room in a failing attempt keep awake. James also sat on his bed, and looked up as Sirius returned. He opened his mouth, then said nothing.

Sirius set the glass on Remus’ nightstand and ran a hand over his hair as he gazed down at the unconscious form. Then he turned to stalk up to James. Grabbing him by the collar and jerking him to his feet, he leaned close to snarl, “What. The. Hell?”

"What do you mean, what the hell?" James shot back, keeping his voice to a hiss. "You were there, you saw him! He was fucking out of control. You want to risk him doing something he has to live with, Padfoot?! If he'd attacked you, it would kill him!" He shoved Sirius back roughly, and sat back on the bed, his shoulders quivering slightly. "Nobody wanted this tonight, but we made it, alright?"

“You didn’t have to attack him! You just…” Sirius threw his hands in the air but managed to lower his voice. “You jumped straight to violence. After I told you not to! You should have trusted me, I wouldn’t have let him hurt me.”

"Sirius!" James jumped up, grabbing his shoulders. "I'm sorry I couldn't risk it. I didn't want to hurt Moony, and I tried to as little as possible. But I'm not sorry I did what I did. I can't live with one of my friends killing another. I'd rather be dead."

“You hurt him,” Sirius returned, all his mind could process at the moment. He turned away and collapsed onto his bed, his back to James. “You hurt him.”

James sank onto the edge of his bed, burying his face in his hands. With a glance across the three beds, he lay back wearily. "Fuck."

 

II.

Sleep took Sirius quickly, but his dreams cycled through the incident in the forest over and over, only with himself frozen in place and unable to do anything as Remus tore into a stranger, or James, or him. Or--worse--he was the one raising his wand against Moony and firing off a spell, only to have the wolf become Remus again a moment too late, staring into his eyes in shock as Sirius’ attack found its mark.

Finally, mercifully, he drifted awake again. The room was quiet, the others still asleep, and the sunlight of late afternoon poured through the windows. Half-falling out of bed, he hurried to Remus’ side. His face was its usual worn pallor, but striking across the wan complexion were barely dry gashes of claws. They trailed down his neck to his shoulders, disappearing beneath the bedding, but faint blood and dirt smudged the blanket tellingly. Remus was soundly asleep, still enough to suggest that he had found some respite in his exhaustion. Sirius stared at him for a long moment, then sniffed and swiped at his eyes before stretching out alongside. Watching Moony sleep, at peace for the moment, was somewhat comforting, but Sirius’ eyes always slipped back to the bloody wounds.

Hours passed, and the room remained silent. Finally, Remus stirred, shifting as Sirius moved fractionally. His eyes opened, and for a brief moment contently rested on Sirius, then his expression turned despondent as wakefulness brought memory.

Sirius blinked his eyes open, and they widened immediately upon finding Remus awake. “Moony.” He grabbed Remus’ curled hand and squeezed it. “You’re all right, we’re all all right, it wasn’t your fault…”

Remus nodded bleakly.

“Are you in much pain? We should get you to the infirmary…”

"No, I'm fine," he tilted his head towards the pillow. "Sirius," he said hushed, "I'm so sorry." Where panic had faded, guilt weighed heavily. Hesitantly, he returned the squeeze.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Sirius returned emphatically. “It wasn’t you. You have to believe that.”

"I'll try," Remus forced a brief smile. "It feels a lot like me..."

“You would never hurt anyone.” Sirius slid closer so their foreheads touched. “I know you. And that wasn’t you.” Remus gave a short, disbelieving laugh, but a visible relief crept across his face. Relaxing, he let his head sink into his pillow.

Across the room, James' bed creaked as he stirred to wakefulness, and Sirius stiffened. Slowly, he sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of his bed. For a moment, he paused, checking over his friends. Then he got up. As he passed, James glanced at the two of them, saying nothing as he looked at Sirius. Sirius steadfastly averted his gaze, and a moment later the door opened and closed softly.

In the silence, time passed without signal of James' return. Finally, the door swung open again slowly. Putting on a smile, James strode over to Remus' bedside. "How's our favorite wolf doing?"

“He’s fine,” Sirius answered, biting back a no thanks to you.

Remus mustered a smile, but it came easier this time. "Glad to hear it," James leaned forward to pat his shoulder, his attention pausing on the two of them. He rejoined brightly, "You're in good hands, Moony. Do you need anything? I can always wake Wormy for a kitchen raid, just say the word!"

With a quiet laugh, Remus shook his head. "I'm alright. Let Peter sleep."

Sirius slipped his hand out of Remus’ and pushed himself up. “We should take him to the infirmary.”

"I'm fine," Remus hesitated, "I've had worse."

James frowned, "Padfoot might be right. You aren't going to be able to go to class like that."

“Yeah, you’ll need to go sooner or later,” Sirius agreed. “Might as well get it done now.”

"Oy, Wormtail!" James called, hitting Peter squarely on the ear with a stray balled up sock. Looking up blearily, Peter's head jerked from his pillow. "We are taking Moony down to Pomfrey."

Sirius stood and reached out an arm to help Remus up. Once the map had been checked and the cloak flung over them, he walked behind the other two by Remus’ side, taking his hand again, not caring about being subtle anymore.

True to the map, they passed unhindered to the infirmary, greeted by the gasp of Madame Pomfrey as they intruded on her evening tidying. Without question, she immediately relieved them of Remus, shepherding him to a bed as she began to retrieve jars and vials. He submitted, subdued in the face of her horrified urgency. Peter followed, hoisting himself into an adjacent bed which Pomfrey permitted. Before Sirius could join them, James put a hand on his shoulder. "What's going on, Padfoot?" he said quietly, gesturing away from the others.

With a glance back at Moony, assuring himself he was in good hands, Sirius sighed and followed James. They stopped at the far end of the room, and Sirius shoved his hands in his pockets. “I… I don’t know. Maybe…” He gave a helpless shrug. “Maybe you did do the right thing. But—seeing you attack him—” He shook his head, eyes on the floor.

James nodded understandingly. "I know," he agreed, dropping his eyes as well, "It's lousy. I'm sorry it had to happen at all." Reaching out, he gave Sirius' shoulder a shake. "We all care about him."

Sirius resisted the urge to pull away and snap, “Not as much as I do.” James did mean well. Instead, he met his friend’s eyes and nodded. “I know. I know you’d never want to hurt him.”

"Of course not!" James sounded surprised at the very idea. He paused, an unusually thoughtful frown creasing his face. "Look, are you alright?"

Involuntarily, Sirius’ eyes traveled back to Remus. “I will be. Just need some more time to recover. Things were fine, and then it all went to shit so fast…”

James nodded. "But we made it. That's what we gotta focus on. If we can brush it off, maybe they will." Then James yanked Sirius into an abrupt hug. Startled, Sirius tensed up for a moment before relaxing to give James a pat on the back.

“Right. We should be able to cheer him up in no time. Maybe some chocolate frogs…”

 

III.

Although the events of the past days were not forgotten, their shadow had lessened with Remus' return to their company. His injuries had healed as if from weeks ago, but new scars traced his features in their place. Between classes, Peter had incorrigibly taken to inventing explanations for them.

"Howabout," he paused for effect, "Dragon tamer. Girls would love that one! Sounds daring, yeah?"

"Surely I'm not a very good one then," Remus laughed.

"Nah!" Peter disagreed, elbowing him as they walked behind their other friends, "If you really weren't very good, you wouldn't be around to be telling a story."

"Alright," came the amused concession, "I'll keep that in mind if any girl asks." Sirius gave a quick glance back to exchange a knowing smile with him. It was such a relief to have things normal again.

Remus quietly returned Sirius' look as he continued to nod along to Peter's prattle. The distraction was welcome and even James had been unusually tolerant of it.

"Speaking of. Have you noticed Arietta Wood?" Peter continued.

"You mean her hair?" Remus answered absently, his hands unassumingly anchored to his satchel strap. "It's short and pink now isn't it?"

Peter made a face. "Certainly is. I always thought she was pretty, but..." he trailed off his indecision pointedly, "It's a bit odd."

"I don't hate it," Remus shrugged.

“Do you think she’s pretty?” Sirius asked, stopping for a moment to fall back next to Remus.

Surprised at Sirius' interest, Remus glanced over at him. "I suppose so," he said mildly, shrugging a second time.

"Do you, Sirius?" Peter interrupted.

“Um, I’ve… never thought about it, I guess.” Sirius echoed Remus with a shrug of his own.

Throwing a look over his shoulder at them, James began chuckling. Peter looked slightly disappointed at the lack of opinion, while Remus considered thoughtfully. With a headshake, James dropped back to walk abreast, encouraging them on to the great hall. "C'mon, mates, this is too deep for an empty stomach."

“Agreed.” Eager to put the subject to rest, Sirius quickened his pace.

As they filed into the massive chamber, Peter willingly relinquished the topic in favor of food. Likewise, James joined him in piling a scrumptious variety from the table's spread onto his plate. Opening a book beside his place setting, Remus made a meager selection which he picked at absently. Sirius automatically served himself a bit of everything, only to stare down at it and realize he didn’t have much appetite anymore. Conversation dissolved into a medley of chewing, and a lingering void despite the backdrop of commotion around them. Hunched over his book, Remus became preoccupied with it, one hand tracing his progress through the page.

Resigned to making himself eat, Sirius asked through a mouthful, “Seen Evans lately, Prongs?”

Halfway through a bite, James looked up. "Just once or twice," he mumbled around it, "Gonna see her later on, but, you know... She's a good sort about it, though."

“She would be.” Sirius gave an exaggerated eye-roll. “Have to wonder how she puts up with the likes of us.”

James grinned, "Exactly. Even you haven't chased her off."

“I had to test her, you know, see if she was worthy. You wouldn’t be happy with someone too uptight.”

"Thanks, mate," he winked, jostling Sirius playfully.

Sirius glanced at Remus for agreement as well but found him still absorbed in his book, his food nearly untouched. “Hey,” he said, nudging Remus’ foot with his own, “Going to eat any of that?”

"Hm?" Remus looked up as if unexpectedly noticing his plate, "Sorry, yes." He took another obligatory bite, chewing slowly as his eyes drifted back to the text. "Just trying to catch up."

“You’ve got time,” Sirius said, bumping Remus with his shoulder. “I’d say you still have a few meals to catch up on too.”

Remus relented slightly, reluctantly marking his place and flipping the book shut. "You're right, I'm just not that hungry," he explained.

“All right, well, I suppose I can let you get away with eating two-thirds of that,” Sirius answered, pointing at Remus’ plate. “But that’s the minimum I’ll accept.” He smirked and propped his chin in his hand as if he were going to watch Remus eat every bite.

Shaking his head, Remus put his fork to his mouth with pointed deliberation. Nonetheless, it proved sufficient motivation. Under Sirius’ watchful eye, Remus made progress, both amused and slightly self-conscious. As lunch period neared its end, they scrambled to collect themselves, and joined the flood of students shuttling to their classrooms.

As they drifted from their final class, Remus was still frowning. An incorrect answer was rare, and the disappointment had shown briefly on Professor Slughorn’s face. Although his friends' opinion was unaffected, Remus trailed pensively at the back of the group.

"More off your game than usual, Lupin," the nasal voice was laced with knowing satisfaction. "What's the matter, did you and your idiot friends finally kill someone?"

Sirius spun on his heel to face Severus Snape, his whole body immediately tense as his eyes narrowed on the skulking form.

"Please, Severus," Remus looked suddenly ill, "You know how sorry I am, I never meant--"

Sirius stepped in front of Remus to grab Snape’s collar. “Shut the fuck up,” he hissed in his face, shoving him against the wall. “You have no idea about anything.”

"What?" he sneered, "Afraid your parents will find out what you keep company with? The Black family must be so proud."

Before he even had time to think, Sirius had reeled his arm back to drive his fist into Snape’s face. “I said, shut up!”

As Severus lifted his head from the blow, his nose was beginning to form a dark drip. He glared back, spitefully pleased. Remus stood helplessly to one side, his mouth half open with words that had come too late.

With another shove for good measure, Sirius growled, “Stay away from us unless you want worse,” and turned his back. “Come on, Moony.”

Venomously, Severus wiped the blood with the back of his sleeve, staring at them. Remus faltered, turning after Sirius with a pained apology written on his face. Fixing Severus with a steely warning, James brushed past him and followed the other two with Peter.

“Fuck that bastard,” Sirius muttered darkly as he stalked away. “He needs to get his nose out of things that are none of his business.”

James nodded in agreement, patting Remus' shoulder as he came up alongside. Remus said nothing. But, slowly, the tension began to dissipate as they retraced their way back to the Gryffindor tower.

While Remus settled in front of the common room fire with a textbook, Sirius was still too restless to remain seated for long. He finally muttered an excuse to the others and retreated to the bedroom, where he resorted to sending his discarded clothing and books flying into piles--not neat ones, but better than having it strewn all over the floor. Finally, bed made for the first time in months, he flopped down on it to stare at the ceiling.

Quietly, the door creaked on its iron hinges. With an unobtrusive nod, Remus slipped in with several books gathered under his arm. He gestured to them indicatively as he crossed to the night table beside his bed. "Is everything alright?" he asked, glancing at Sirius' organizational efforts.

In response, Sirius groaned and flung his arms over his face. “I don’t even know anymore.”

Setting the books down with the a dull thump of leather on wood, Remus aligned them on the table for a moment. The bed shifted as he sat beside Sirius, one leg folded under him. "I'm so sorry," his head drooped, "I don't know-- I just--"

Sirius sat up quickly to drape his arms over Remus from behind, his face against Remus’ hair. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I should be apologizing to you.”

"What?" Remus said with a doubtful laugh, turning his head towards Sirius. "Why?"

“It’ll take too long to tell you here.” Reluctantly, Sirius let go and stood to face him. “Astronomy tower?”

Remus nodded, concerned but willing, "Alright."

Sirius took Remus’ hand to pull him to his feet and kept hold of it until they reached the door. Once down the stairs and back in the common room, he paused before Peter and James, who were still lolling by the fire. “Moony and I are off for a chat,” he announced. “We’ll be back in a bit.” He strode on without waiting for a response.

They walked the familiar route in silence, and despite Sirius’ efforts to convince himself otherwise, his heart was beating faster and his palms growing sweatier the closer they came to their destination. Finally, out in the sharp, cool air, he stopped and turned to face his companion.

“I’m not a good person,” he started, eyes cast toward the ground to his right. “I’m loud and brash and obnoxious and angry. I do what I want without thinking about the consequences, or sometimes just without caring. And that’s nothing new, I’ve known for ages and honestly never saw it as a problem. Except… I never stopped to think that it could be a problem for other people.” Hesitantly, he raised his eyes to Remus’ face for just a brief moment. “I know what I want, but I realized that I never stopped to ask if you want the same thing.”

Speech over, he hunched his shoulders and scuffed a toe on the floor, waiting for the verdict.

"Is that... it?" Remus said slowly, a hesitant smile starting to form. It turned to shy fondness as it rested on him. "Sirius Black, are you asking me if I--?"

A blush crept over Sirius’ face. “Yes. That. Better late than never, right? And you can say no,” he hastened to add. “There are other people out there--girls…”

"So?" Remus shrugged, "I love you." His cheeks colored as the words quietly left his mouth. Pulling Sirius towards him, he hid behind a hurried kiss that melted into something far softer.

After a few moments, Sirius drew away long enough to whisper, “I love you, too, Remus Lupin,” before his lips returned to their prior occupation.

Gradually, their slow exchanges drew to a pause, their foreheads pressed to each other and noses still touching. Remus' hands rested lightly along Sirius' jaw, fingertips just touching the dark strands that that framed the elegant features. With a heartfelt sigh, he opened his eyes to look into the soulful grey pair opposite, his expression solemn in its sincerity: "You--and the others, Sirius--you are the best things in my life. I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

“You won’t,” Sirius answered, voice husky. “I will always be here for you. And I know the others feel the same. Even Prongs—even though—” He couldn’t finish the thought, despite knowing James hadn’t been wrong. The memory was still a wound that he preferred to keep covered.

Remus nodded, "Can we stay awhile?"

“I’d like nothing better.” Sirius sank down to sit on the stone floor, reaching for Remus’ hand to draw him down by his side.

Taking the hand, Remus joined him, leaning his head onto Sirius' shoulder. Suddenly, Remus began to chuckle. "Snivellus is right, you know," he said, trying to suppress his laughter, "What would your family think?"

Sirius widened his eyes at Remus. “You really had to mention them?” he asked in mock dismay. “You think I want to think about my parents right now? Although…” His mouth quirked up into a wry smile. “I do rather enjoy knowing that I could disgrace them even further, if I wanted to.”

"Happy to help," Remus laughed softly once more, pressing his face to Sirius. Their legs outstretched alongside on the floor, shoes tilted towards each other. A cool spring breeze ruffled the fading day.

Finally, Sirius squeezed Remus’ hand. “So… do you think we should tell Prongs and Wormy? I mean, they’re bound to figure it out sooner or later, right? Probably sooner at this point.”

Remus glanced up, plainly having not considered this. "I... don't know," he said slowly. Apprehensively, he turned their hands over, looking at their intertwined fingers.

“It’s fine if you don’t want to,” Sirius quickly reassured him. “We can wait. It’s just sad, you know, having to hide it. Having to pretend.” His thumb brushed the back of Remus’ hand.

"I suppose you are right," Remus nodded carefully.

The pair returned to their dormitory as the hall torches blazed and the common room fireplace had smouldered to cozy embers. James and Peter had retired to the room. While Peter grumbled at a heavily blotted parchment, James toyed idly with a snitch. As the door swung open, the flutter of filigree wings ceased with an abrupt snatch.

“Hey, mates,” Sirius greeted the two, pulling the door shut and stopping next to Remus. “Want to know a secret?” He leaned back casually against the door frame, arms crossed, one foot up on the wall. When James just stared back at him quizzically, and Peter looked absolutely befuddled, he went on, “Well, it’s like this,” and pushed himself forward to take Remus’ face in his hands and kiss him.

All three of his friends momentarily froze in wide-eyed shock, underscored by the small crash of Peter's inkwell tumbling to the floor. As the kiss broke, Remus stared back, flushed and motionless.

His mouth opening slightly, James glanced between them in confusion, until a grin slowly emerged. "Mates!" he gestured wildly, his enthusiasm still well short of comprehension. Peter's lips formed an O, as the answer to this unasked question finally dawned.

“That’s not the first time we’ve done that,” Sirius added, looking from James and Peter back to Remus. “Even though Moony may look like it is.” He elbowed Remus lightly.

Braving a glance towards their friends, Remus cracked a relieved smile. James laughed, springing up from the bed to join them, while Peter nearly tripped over himself in the same maneuver.

"I can see how you'd think this was worse than just being a werewolf, Moony," James grinned, shaking Sirius' shoulder teasingly.

Sirius had no defense, not even in jest, and just grinned back before turning his eyes to Remus again. Remus met his gaze shyly content.

"So, what do you think about this, Wormy?" James prodded, hanging from an arm around Sirius.

Peter shrugged, "I knew it." James punched him lightly. "Ow! I just never really thought about it!"

Sirius chuckled and rolled his eyes. “Sure you did. Either we two are masters of subtlety, or you’re the most oblivious friends anyone’s ever had.”

IV.

It was Sunday morning when James shook Sirius awake, a surreptitious grin already firmly in place. Across their shared room, Remus and Peter still slept, one in a curl, the other in a tangled sprawl. Crouching beside Sirius, James waggled a scrap of parchment with a single scrawl. "How do you fancy paying your dear brother a visit, Padfoot?"

Groaning, Sirius blinked at James. “Isn’t it your birthday? Why would you want to spend it with him?”

James rolled his eyes patiently, waving the paper closer to Sirius' face. Inked across the dancing paper, the script blurrily read, "Asphodel." He grinned, "Well, not exactly with him."

“What are you on about?” Sirius pushed himself up. “What’s ‘asphodel’ got to do with Regulus?”

"It's the password, you prat," James smirked, crumpling the scrap triumphantly in his hand. "So, do you want to see what our Slytherin friends are up to, or no?"

“Why didn’t you say that in the first place?!” Sirius flung his blankets aside and scrambled out of bed.

"Brilliant!" James rushed to his trunk and rummaged for his cloak. Tucking the shimmering garment under his arm, he turned back to Sirius. "Shall we, or are you going to wear pyjamas?"

“Well I suppose it wouldn’t be very dignified,” Sirius grumbled, and knelt to hunt through his clothing heap. Once properly garbed, he slipped out the door after James, giving a quick, fond glance back at the still-sleeping Remus.

With a conspiratorial arm around Sirius, they crept down the halls and out of their dormitory. As they approached the dungeons, they ducked into an alcove to consult the map. Activity in the Slytherin quarters was sluggish, and the named scrolls floated sparsely about the corridors. Regulus' room was notably empty as James unfurled the cloak and drew it around them with a silvery ripple. Approaching the dungeon wall, James whispered the passphrase and the stones groaned into an open passage. With a grin to Sirius, he tugged the cloak over their heads and slipped down the dim hall.

Sirius hadn’t realized how much he’d missed this until James had explained his scheme. After so much excitement, it had been nice to have everything quiet for a few weeks, but now it was high time for some proper mischief. Especially now that he and James were back to normal.

The tunnel was damp and laced with shadows, torches flickering from iron sconces bolted into the dark stone. James' face made his disdain for these aesthetics plain as they crept carefully along the passage. An echo of voices ahead gave them pause. Pressing themselves against the cool stones, two Slytherins ambled past unawares. James grinned. Sirius clapped a hand to his mouth to keep from bursting into laughter. After the footsteps had faded away, he nudged James forward again.

They navigated the common room carefully, skirting the looming fireplace. A few students clumped around it, where the giant black mantle overhung the dull crackle of a heavy iron grate. From there, it was simple to slip towards the boy's dormitories, and into Regulus' room. Dimly lit, the chamber was largely tidy, arrayed with formality with the exception of a few garments draped neatly over a chair. The coverlets had been straightened carefully and, beside the bed, a photograph and several books topped the dresser. Closing the door behind them, James slipped off the cloak.

Sirius surveyed the room with disgust--totally devoid of personality, except for that of an uptight asshole. “God, I want to trash the place,” he remarked. “I won’t, but let it be noted that I really, really want to.”

"Noted," James laughed. "Well, in that case, what shall we do?" He tilted back the photograph to look at it idly.

“Fucking hell.” Sirius stepped up next to James to stare at the picture. It was him, rolling his eyes but then curving his mouth into a genuine smile, shifting to pull Regulus closer with the arm he had around his brother’s shoulders. Behind them were their parents--Orion and Walburga, Blacks through and through, the arrogance in his father’s eyes, the contempt in his mother’s thin-lipped smile. She had a hand on Sirius’ shoulder, but it looked less like affection and more like a vice.  “Fuck,” he repeated, and yanked out his wand to hold it poised, pointing at the photograph.

"You sure?" James interposed. He frowned at the image, then at his friend. "It's old enough, Padfoot, maybe leave it?"

For a long moment Sirius stood with his fist clenched around the wand, hand trembling slightly, before letting out a long breath and lowering it. “You’re right. What does it matter? Let him hold onto the past if he wants to.” Turning away abruptly, he slid the wand into his back pocket again. “Now, what else has he got around here?”

Since there wasn’t much else in plain sight, he pulled open the door of the pretentious ornately-carved wardrobe. Clean robes and shirts hung in a regimented line, with shoes arranged equally stodgily at the bottom. But on one side stood a distinctive case. “Oy, Prongs. I found his Nimbus,” he announced, gloom suddenly replaced by glee.

James raised an eyebrow appreciatively as he inspected the broomstick. The glossy curve of the shaft was barely scuffed, hardly a bristle out of place. "Haven't seen this on the pitch yet, must be new!"

“Of course they would buy him the latest model,” Sirius muttered. He shifted his eyes from the broom to James as his mouth quirked into a wicked smirk. “Let’s take it!”

James grinned at the tempting prospect, then another thought burgeoned. "But why deprive him of showing it off at the next game?" he drew his wand with a flourish. "How do you like, 'Slytherfarts' spelled out behind him across the pitch? I'm thinking Gryffindor colors."

Sirius let out a bark of laughter. “Genius! I can’t wait to see the look on his face…”

With a flick of his wrist, the charm sparked from the tip of the wand. The faintest puffs of gold and crimson began to curl from the dark bristles. "With any luck," James snickered, "Should make for a memorable entrance."

“Brilliant. Now I suppose we should get going…” Sirius took care to return the broom to its case and lean it exactly where it had been. After a quick glance around the room to ensure that no evidence of their visit remained, he nodded to James.

Satisfied with their venture, the pair slunk back under the cover of the cloak. As they reached the castle corridors beyond, they slipped from beneath its cover and James bundled it away. "Excellent work, Mr. Padfoot," he congratulated, "Mischief managed, I should think." There was a slight pause as the two basked in their success. Then James added offhandedly, "My parents have got a spare room, you know."

“Do they…” Sirius mused, shooting James a grateful glance. “How do they feel about the smell of wet dog?”

James' grin widened as he knocked shoulders with Sirius. "Nah! Moony's the only one who notices, and it doesn't seem to bother him any."

“You got that right,” Sirius answered with a roguish eyebrow waggle.

His smile undiminished, James paused, before simply jostling Sirius again with an approving shove. In return Sirius ruffled his friend’s hair, and then whistled the rest of the way back.

 

V.

Shoes off, Sirius lay flopped on his back on Remus’ bed, using Remus’ leg as a pillow. His potions textbook was propped up on his chest, and, having a feeling he wasn’t going to get much done over the upcoming break, he was actually reading it.

Bending over his book, Remus traced his reading with one hand, while the other rested in the fringes of Sirius' hair. "Alright, so what would be an example of Golpalott's Third Law, then?" he asked. From the foot of the bed, Peter groaned in frustration, planting his face in the pages before him. Remus smiled encouragingly down at Sirius, waiting.

A dreamy smile crossed Sirius’ face in return. “Um, Galpalall, did you say?”

"Gallapalalaface," came Peter's muffled complaint.

"Golpalott," Remus corrected, brushing a stray lock from Sirius' face as he referred back to his text. "'The antidote for a blended poison will be equal to more than the sum of the antidotes for each of the separate components,'" he read aloud. "So, in addition to the antidote components, you need to find an additional ingredient to bind-- to blend them all together..." His voice trailed off as he skimmed farther down the page, hunching forward over it.

Sirius sighed affectionately and patted Remus’ foot. “So smart. Isn’t he so smart, Wormy?” He flipped a page of his own book, then remembered he hadn’t finished the last one yet.

Peter grunted.

Remus' bowed head bobbed towards Sirius, his shaggy hair hiding all but a brief glimpse of bashful pleasure. "So, does that make sense?" he frowned back at his book. "Not sure how you know what sort you need... I think we'll be asked though..."

“I’ll check the index,” Sirius volunteered. “If you could just remind me of that name one more time?” He tilted his head back to give Remus a wide-eyed, innocent look.

"Gol-pa-lott," Remus annunciated, glancing down as he finished, and breaking into a soft smile at the gaze that met his. Heaving his face from his tome, Peter propped himself up on one elbow and Remus diverted his attention back to his own textbook.

“Got it. Gallapoll.” Sirius flipped to the back of the book. “G-A…”

Lightly, Remus smacked his shoulder. "Surely, even you aren't that thick," he laughed. Leaning over Sirius, he began running his finger down the index.

"Here it is," Peter held up his book.

"See?" Remus eyed Sirius, "Peter's got it."

“Bloody hell, I really am thick,” Sirius groaned, pulling his book over his face.

The door burst open, as James and Lily piled into the room. James set down the sizeable stack of books dramatically onto his bed, as Lily greeted the boys. "Learning a lot under there, Sirius?" she chirped, before perching with James.

"Hello, Lils," Remus said brightly. "Just trying to get through Potions."

"What's amortentia?" Peter interjected, scrutinizing the paragraph to which his focus had arbitrarily slipped. "Have we heard of that before?"

“I dunno,” Sirius answered, sliding the book away. “Have we, Moony?” He shot Remus a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

His expression flickered with guilty memory. "I expect we've stumbled across it before," he admitted. Peter looked quizzical, James amused, and Lily concerned.

“Anyone remember our adventure over Christmas holiday?” Sirius asked airily. “We may have… acquired some of said potion along the way.”

"That's nothing to be careless with, you know!" Lily admonished, fixing her gaze firmly on Sirius.

"We haven't done anything with it," Remus hurriedly reassured her. "I don't even think Sirius remembered until just now..."

"See, Lils," James patted her arm, giving it a playful squeeze, "Even Moony says it's alright."

Skeptically, she turned to Remus, gradually relenting, "Well, you oughtn't have nicked it."

"Fine, but what is it?" Peter persisted.

Lily threw her hands up at them in resignation, "Alright, let's see."

“Alright.” Sirius scrambled up but then hesitated. “Say, Moony, you wouldn’t happen to remember where I put it, would you?”

"Did you-- Surely, it's not still in your pocket," Remus sighed with a growing suspicion.

“Well, if it is…” Sirius eyed his corner of the room, where shirts hung out of half-open dresser drawers and a pile of miscellaneous attire perched precariously on a chair back--not to mention the veritable carpet of clothing on the floor. “Oh here, I know.” He closed his eyes to recall the scene: slipping into Slughorn’s office with Moony, watching as he expertly unlocked the cabinet, grabbing a bottle of whiskey and then a potion as well for good measure. It had been a small vial full of a creamy, sort of iridescent liquid, with a neat label on the side…

“Accio amortentia,” he pronounced with a wave of his wand, opening his eyes, and a moment later a crumpled pair of black jeans flew out from under his bed, bringing several dust balls with them. As the small glass bottle slipped from the pocket the pants dropped to the floor, and the potion sailed into Sirius’ waiting hand.

Lily immediately held out her hand, palm up demanding the vial. "Amortentia," she addressed Peter, "Is a very powerful love potion, capable of producing an intense infatuation for a short period of time."

“Going to drink it, Evans?” Sirius asked as he handed it over. “Think James could handle seeing you infatuated with me?”

James burst into a laugh as Lily immediately wrinkled her nose. "Happy, Padfoot?" he ribbed.

"Oh, stop it!" Lily shoved him in return, "You're hardly better."

“Well, at least tell us what you smell,” Sirius suggested, undaunted, as he returned to sit on the bed by Remus.

Lily raised an eyebrow. "So you did pay that much attention, hm?" she remarked. Sliding out the tiny stopper with an audible pop, she held the plump little glass under her nose. As she took a deep breath, a smile slipped across her lips, "Cranberries, and coffee, and mud after a rain."

“Mud, Evans? Really?” Sirius shook his head at her with a teasing smile. “All right, Prongs, you have a go.”

James leaned forward over Lily's shoulder, his chin resting on her as she held the bottle up for him. She watched expectantly as he mused over the scent. "Fresh air, worn leather, and something-- toffee, I think?"

“Toffee cake, perhaps?” Sirius asked, catching James’ eye and then looking pointedly at Lily.

James just grinned back, before gesturing towards the three on Remus' bed. "Alright then, one of you have a go!"

With a flick of his wand, Sirius drew the bottle from Lily’s hand and brought it to hover in front of Peter. “Your turn, Wormy.”

With some reluctance, Peter snatched it out of the air, regarding it critically. As he finally held it to his nose, his expression warmed quickly. "Mm, smells like buttered toast and mum's old quilt." He enjoyed it a moment longer before holding it out again.

“Predictable old Wormy,” Sirius said with a laugh, leaning forward to take the bottle and then offering it to Remus. “Moony?”

"Oh? I'm next, am I?" Remus laughed, making a mock-nervous expression. He took the small vial gingerly, holding it up to catch a waft of the scent. "Chocolate, obviously, em," he nodded unsurprised, then trailed off.

Lily tilted her head, "Really, just the one? That's odd. Really think about it, what else do you smell, Remus?"

"Em," he hesitated, "Dog." He cleared his throat, pushing the bottle towards Sirius.

A grin split Sirius’ face, which he immediately tried to suppress for Remus’ sake. “Right, sure, your favorite animal. All right, I guess I owe you all…” He took the potion, his fingers brushing Remus’, and gave the liquid a swirl before lifting it to his nose and breathing deeply. “Well, there’s autumn leaves… mmm, and mulled wine… and…” His eyes involuntarily jumped to Remus, who was wearing one of his trademark baggy, elbow-patched jumpers. “Ehh, old clothing, I guess?”

"Old clothing?" Lily teased, "And you laughed at mud! But that's the thing of it." With a flick of her wand, the crystal bottle flew to her, "Now then, I'll see that this makes its way back to Professor Slughorn's." She pocketed it definitively. Flipping open one of the books across her lap, she settled comfortably leaning into James, "Have you gone over the Wiggenweld Potion?"

Sirius’ frown moved from his empty hand to Lily. Ah well, it wasn’t worth objecting. At least they’d gotten some fun out of it. He couldn’t help grinning again as he glanced back at Remus, who had also studiously bent his head over a book once more. “Not yet,” he answered, “but no time like the present I suppose.”

"That's the spirit, Black." Lily began reading aloud from the text, propping it up on her knees. Nudging James, she passed the reading to him, indicating his place with a fingertip.

"You getting all this, Pete?" James badgered, noticing the furious scritch of his quill.

"No! Wait! So it turns yellow after the lionfish spines?"

"The first five," Remus nodded, glancing up.

"And then it turns purple?" Peter flushed as he blotted another heavy scrawl across the parchment.

"After five more and the flobberworm mucus," Lily clarified. "And then you add more mucus until it turns..?" She covered the paragraph with her hand, grinning challengingly at James.

“Hm... Yellow again-- no!" James stopped as Lily's face began to change. "Orange, and then yellow," he corrected with a smirk.

"James Potter!" Lily's approval erupted into a sudden squeal, as an unexpected tickle earned him a rather unrestrained smack in reply.

“Oy! Aren’t we supposed to be studying?” Sirius demanded. “Now Wormy, next you add honeywater until it turns…?”

Peter stared blankly, glancing around for help. As Remus began to mouth the answer silently, Peter leaned forward, struggling to make it out, "Tur... Quoi... Turquoise...?" Despite the coaching, Peter's tone remained devoid of confidence. Remus nodded encouragingly.

“All right, Potter, what’s the final step?” Sirius turned his gaze on the pair opposite. “And no help from Evans this time.”

Holding their book shut, Lily grinned while James screwed up his face in dramatic thought. "Stir in the boom berries, and simmer for... a while and cool." Lily shook her head, waiting. For a few seconds, James pondered, then shrugged at his defeat.

“Boom berry juice,” Sirius corrected, “and it’s thirty minutes. Bet you knew that, Moony.”

Remus shrugged, returning Sirius' glance with a small smile. In mock-tragedy, James flopped back onto the bed.

"No one cares, James," Lily announced, letting the book fall open again. "Alright. 'How to prepare the Sopophorous bean...'," she continued.

Somehow, they managed to stay more or less on track until Peter had started nodding over his notes. Sirius poked his leg with a toe, but got only a snore in response. “Well, looks like Wormy’s declared this session over.”

Lily glanced over with a smile. "I guess that's about all we can do for now," she quietly closed the textbook with a soft thump. "Maybe we can try again sometime."

"Sure," Remus agreed, "We'll need the study."

"Well, maybe not you," Lily laughed, but he shrugged doubtfully.

Gathering her books, James got up in tandem. "We'll take a few of these back to the library," he offered, flashing a winning smile which Lily returned. Waving at the three of them, the pair crept out, the door catching its latch behind them.

“Well they couldn’t wait to get out of here,” Sirius remarked, and pantomimed gagging.

Setting his book aside, Remus shook his head pleasantly. "They aren't that bad. I like her."

“Oh, I like her fine. Just can’t quite stand them. I preferred pining Prongs over…” Sirius gestured toward the recently-vacated seats. “That.”

Remus laughed in spite of himself, "Well, it looks as though you had better get used to it."

With a dramatic sigh, Sirius flopped back onto Remus’ pillow. “Sure seems that way.”

"I think you'll manage." Remus lingered fondly before reaching for another book to hunch over.

“Are you really going to keep studying? You’ve got all break for that.” Sirius reached up a hand to rub Remus’ neck.

"Not all break," he reminded, letting himself relax into Sirius' touch.

“Most of break,” Sirius amended. “And you’ll be able to get so much more done then because I won’t be around to distract you.”

Remus nodded, a small slump to his shoulders.

“So we should make the most of the time we have now, eh?” Sirius smiled up at him and gave his shoulder a gentle shake.

The beginnings of a matching smile jostled to life on Remus' face as he submitted to the playful sway.

“That’s more like it. Now, can we officially forget about studying for the night?”

"Mm, hm," Remus assented, lying back beside Sirius. In the silence, Peter's rhythmic snores from the foot of the bed elicited a hushed laugh. Remus rolled towards Sirius to muffle it, curling up slightly, his face pressed into his shoulder.

Sirius twisted to slide an arm around Remus, pulling him closer. “I hope I smell properly dog-like,” he whispered in Remus’ ear.

His body shook with another stifled laugh, but if color touched his cheeks, it was hidden along with his buried face. "Just perfect," he mumbled.

Sirius let his head rest on Remus’, breathing in the slightly musty smell from the amortentia. “And you’d better never stop wearing these ratty old jumpers, because apparently I have a weakness for them.”

 

**~ April 1977 ~**

I.

While other students had already filtered from the dormitories to the respite of Easter break, the foursome had yet to show their own progress. As the day wore on, still they stagnated in an unspoken wait. By mid-day, the Gryffindor common room held only the last stragglers who loitered in anticipation of some later train.

Remus glanced around quietly at his friends, all in various states of aimless occupation. "You needn’t wait, you know," he said, breaking the silence awkwardly. "It's really fine," he assured, "James, surely your parents haven't seen you in ages already."

“Of course we’re waiting,” Sirius answered firmly from his seat at Remus’ feet, glancing at James for agreement. “It’s only a few days, it won’t make a difference.”

"Exactly," James tossed his snitch, "It's already been 'ages,' what's a bit more?"

Hesitating, Remus persisted. "It's just--"

"Stop arguing, Moony," James cut him off cheerfully, "You ought to know it won't do any good."

Sirius rested his chin on Remus’ leg and looked up at him with a gentler version of his usual grin. “He’s right. No way in hell are we about to abandon you.”

"Alright," Remus pressed a smile, "I just don't know if we should..."

“Well…” Sirius dropped his eyes and his smile faded. “I was wondering—maybe we should stay in the shack this time? Just to be safe?”

James and Peter glanced up immediately, looking between the two. "No, I think that's a good idea," Remus swallowed, "That's-- that would be-- good."

A pout began to form on Peter's expression, stilled as James shot him a glare. "Just for the once, of course," James softened, telegraphing the question towards Sirius.

“Right,” Sirius agreed immediately. “Just, you know, a break.”

Time seemed to slow with the castle emptied. Remus had fallen into his sickly pallor, although remaining stubbornly committed to his studies until he fell asleep on their pages. Out of sheer boredom, even James and Peter idly attended their own studies as the empty afternoon wore on. A book tumbled to the ground as it slipped from Peter's hand. Lolling off the bed, he reached lazily for it, his fingertips brushing the spine in an attempt to coax it closer.

Lying half-propped up next to Remus, Sirius watched Peter’s feeble efforts for a moment before lifting his wand from the nightstand and sending the book rising to meet Peter’s grasp. Peter groped for the book, barely catching it. Still draped off the bed, he turned it upside down and propped it open on the floor in front of him. James watched over the cover of his textbook, unimpressed. With a flick of his wand, the book tipped into Peter's reddening face.

Sirius’ expression held a challenge as he glanced at James and then flipped the book right-side up to hover conveniently in front of Peter. Shrugging, James tucked his wand behind an ear, and slouched restlessly in the chair.

“What’s the matter, Prongs?” Sirius asked, his tone just the slightest bit taunting. “Missing Evans already?”

"Something like that," James replied. He stared hard into his textbook. "I've decided to become an Auror," he said suddenly. "I know we've still got a year to go, but the Ministry needs everyone they can get, and I've already put my name down."

Peter’s book dropped to the floor with a smack as Sirius stared at James. “You-- I-- An--” Finally, he managed to get out, “Why didn’t you say something before now?”

"It's not something we do as a group," James shrugged solemnly, "Even if we want to." He lowered his voice. "We all know Moony can't be one. And you two can't join just because I do."

“Well, but… you could’ve at least told me you were thinking about it.”

"I know," James said grimly. "I've only just done it. Haven't told Lils either. I figured we could sort through it after holidays."

“Why now, though? We’ve still got over a year left; isn’t it a bit premature?” Involuntarily, Sirius glanced at wan, sleeping Remus.

"There's talk of accepting students right out of graduation... But who knows if they might need them sooner. Anyway, I had to feel like I was doing something. This fight is important; we can't lose it."

“Sometimes I forget that deep down, you’re actually as much of a goody-goody as Evans.” Sirius put on a teasing tone and a smile--but what he’d really wanted to say was, “Aren’t there other important things, too?”

The wind wrapped the swaying willow with its mild tendrils as the moon rose over the castle grounds. Peter melted into his tiny rat-form, skittering beneath the sinewy branches to find the quieting knot that allowed their passage. In usual procession, the three creatures traversed the tunnel to the shack.

As they approached the doorway, Sirius stepped up in front of the other two, but entered the room more slowly than normal, head bowed submissively. The wolf stood across the room watching, hackles up. Looking into its sharp eyes and finding no sign of Remus almost made Sirius turn and streak back down the tunnel. But if he did, Remus would remember. So he crouched low and let out a soft whimper, and the wolf slowly relaxed, tossing its head playfully.

Nostrils flaring, the wolf padded forwards. As he reached Sirius, he sniffed, then nipped at the other canine in acceptance. Spreading his forelegs, he bowed to an energetic challenge and growled. Sirius leaped up to tackle him, hoping he could expend some of the wolf’s energy right away so that his confinement would be less of a trial.

With snarls and snaps, the wolf rolled onto his back, tumbling and scrambling as they wrestled. James joined the tussle, buffeting the wolf playfully. As long as they could, they occupied him in tandem. Finally, tongue panting and legs splayed in a settled crouch, the large wolf seem content to still for a moment.

Panting as well, Sirius sank to the floor and thumped his tail contentedly, watching to see if the wolf would take the cue.

Inching forward crouched, the wolf closed the distance between them. With a paw over Sirius, he began to nuzzle encouragingly, licking the dog's face. Slowly, he sank to a squirming sprawl beside him. At first Sirius had to keep from pulling away in disgust--but the thought of getting to tease Moony about this once he was back to himself made it worth it. And having the wolf lying next to him, gentle and tame for the moment, was the best substitute he could get for Remus’ actual presence right now.

The whuff from the stag strongly suggested a laugh, as James folded his legs under him to enjoy the respite. With the scrabble of tiny paws, Peter climbed onto a dusty shelf nearby, his tail dangling from it as he stretched out. Remus finally laid his head heavily over Sirius' back, a soft whine accompanying his glance towards the shack door.

Sirius closed his eyes and let his breathing slow, trying to influence the wolf to further relax as well. They hadn’t talked about what they would do if wolf-Remus got upset at his lack of freedom, which they probably should have done…

For better or worse, the night passed in tides of strain and sleep. Mercifully, the wolf complied with their distractions, content to wrestle within the confines of the shack when he could not rest. And at last the evening had passed. The wolf faded with the dim haze of dawn, leaving only Remus nestled against the black fur. Curled beside them, the stag blinked glassily, and, just above on the crooked shelf, came the faint rhythmic squeak of Peter's tiny snore. The movement pulled Sirius from his nap, and opening his eyes to find Remus back brought a flood of relief and joy. As he shifted back to human, he encircled him in his arms.

Remus smiled back wearily, interrupted as James threw what had been a neatly folded pile of clothes at him. "Alright, c'mon then," he prompted, turning to collect the still dozing rat. But there was a stark relief as the night, and soon the shack, was behind them.

Back in the abnormally empty dorm, Sirius made sure Remus was comfortably settled in bed and then slid in beside him. “Do you mind?” he whispered. “I can go if I’ll be in the way.”

"No, stay," came the hushed reply. Snores and stillness already punctuated the room from their friends. Remus put an arm around Sirius, tightening the hug urgently for a moment, and Sirius hugged him back just as tightly.

 

II.

As the train pulled away, Remus remained on the platform alone. Hurried goodbyes had divided them, and now James and Sirius sat behind the smudged glass of their own carriage watching him shrink from view. A final glance saw his retreat to an unobtrusive corner, accompanied by his worn leather case. With the station behind them, the lurching tug of the engine found a steady rattle. Comfortably, James leaned back into the seat, his eyes closed and arms folded. Sirius’ gaze, however, remained on the window. He and Remus hadn’t been apart a single day since last summer, which was ages ago. Of course it was nice he would finally get to see his parents, but did it really have to be for almost two weeks? Surely two days would have been sufficient. Then he could have come and joined them at James’…

With a sigh, he finally pulled his focus to the train car. “Oy, Prongs, you can’t nod off already. Who else is going to keep me entertained?”

"What?" James cracked open one eye. "You nervous to meet the Potters?"

“I wasn’t until you said that,” Sirius joked. “Really though, you talk about them like they’re the ideal parents. They can’t actually be that perfect.”

"Can't they?" James grinned, running his fingers through his hair for effect. "No, you are right. Mum puts far too much sugar in her tea, dad snores like a troll, and neither one know a thing about who's likely to win the world cup."

“Aha, I knew they had to have some dirty secrets. Snoring, ugh--makes my parents look downright pleasant by comparison.” Sirius did his best to keep the glimmers of jealousy out of his voice, but wasn’t sure if he quite succeeded.

"Give it a week, Padfoot," he laughed, kicking his feet up onto the bench opposite. "Mum'll have you in some awful apron of hers making biscuits with her, or running back to Hogwarts."

“I can’t decide which sounds worse,” Sirius returned with an exaggerated cringe.

"It's a real toss up," James settled his arms back across his chest. "Don't worry, they were thrilled when I mentioned you coming. You'd think they'd gotten bored of just me or something."

A smile twisted Sirius’ lips before he could help it. Turning it into a smirk, he answered, “Right, I’m sure they could use some excitement. You’re probably as bad as Peter when you’re home, doing nothing but sleeping, eating, and watching quidditch.”

"If I'm lucky," James returned slyly, "And with you to fuss over, I just might be."

“Glad to be of service, mate.” Sirius sat back and propped his feet, mirroring James. “Now, tell me more about your mum’s cooking.”

"You mean what she does with, or without magic?" he elbowed Sirius. "Dad says 'wand away, hide your plate.' And of course mum loves that, you know. But it hasn't stopped her yet." He chuckled, playing the scene out in his head.

“You really are all happy together,” Sirius marveled. “I thought it was all stories, you know. Happy families.”

After the rattle of train-carriages and stations, the boys at last concluded their travels on the doorstep of the Potters' comfortable townhome. James had barely reached for the knob when the door swung open to two beaming faces, creased with years of the same. Dropping his luggage on the doorstep, James wrapped his arms around both as a cheery flood of greetings were exchanged.

"And you must be Sirius Black," his father relinquished James to his wife's persistent embrace, offering a genial handshake.

"Fleamont!" Euphemia scolded over James' shoulder. Pushing her son aside, she extended a forceful hug to their visitor. "We're so glad you've come. James, you know all your friends might have, if they liked!"

"I expect they might have had other places to be, Euphie," Fleamont twinkled.

"Well, I expect," she seemed slightly disappointed at the prospect, "But, at least we've got you!" She took Sirius' arm and ushered him inside as her husband collected the discarded baggage. "Now let's get you comfortable, I'll show you where you'll stay. James! Help your father."

Helpless to resist, Sirius followed along, giving one quick bewildered glance back at James. “Um, nice house,” he remarked, now that there was finally a pause.

"We like it," Euphemia nodded. Although well shy of Grimmauld Place, the Potters' home was ample and comfortably furnished. "Of course, if you need anything, I'm sure one of us can sort it out." Just past a door ajar enough to see the Gryffindor banners and quidditch posters covering the walls, she steered him into a neatly kept spare room. Light spilled in through the garden window, giving it a rosy hue. A moment later, James barged in behind them, dumping Sirius' case unceremoniously in the middle of the floor. "Well, I'll let you get comfortable, then," his mother smiled at them both, "And when you get hungry, just come down, and we'll find out just what you've both been up to."

“Thanks,” Sirius managed as she left, and hurried to shut the door after her. “James!” he exclaimed, whirling on his friend. “You should’ve warned me, she’s like you on steroids!”

Unable to suppress a roar of laughter, James sprawled comfortably on the bed, wrinkling the coverlet unapologetically. "Think you'll manage?" he joked, pulling a pillow into a squashed hug underneath him.

“Well, as long as she’s channeling that energy into setting me up a nice room and cooking me food, I should be all right.” Sirius hadn’t expected much more than a makeshift bed on James’ floor. “I bet she’s the kind who’ll tidy up after us every morning because she actually enjoys it.”

"So far it's more fun watching you find out," James grinned. Springing up, he threw an arm around Sirius, dragging him towards the door. "Ready to answer some questions?"

“Do I have a choice?”

"Nope!"

“All right then, lead the way,” Sirius agreed, and let James pull him along.

Downstairs, in a green kitchen, the Potters waited. Euphemia wiped her hands on her apron, her wand poking from the large pocket, and turned to the boys with a wide smile. "Room's alright, Sirius?" She asked.

"He's fine, mum," James gave his friend a mild shove as he pulled up a chair at the table.

Fleamont creased back his newspaper, looking down the table at them before folding it away. Opposite James, Euphemia joined them, taking a biscuit from the flowered plate in the center. With her other hand, she pushed it towards them.

"Now, then, you two," Fleamont rapped the tabletop mock-sternly. "It's been far too long since we've gotten a proper update! How's the old red and gold holding up this year? And don't think you can get away with leaving out the details." He winked at Sirius.

“Um, well…” Sirius cast a flustered glance at James. “Fine? We’re keeping busy, you know, with schoolwork.”

"Schoolwork?!" A youthful grin spread across the elderly face. "I should hope that's not all there is!"

Euphemia caught a sparkle in James' eye and casually twirled the fringe of the placemat. "How's that Evans girl?" She coaxed.

"Oh, not too bad. She's been going out with a pretty decent guy these days," James smirked, biting a biscuit in half.

"That's my boy!" Fleamont chuckled approvingly, rustling his newspaper with a shake.

Clapping her hands, his mother beamed. "I hope this means we'll get to meet her one of these days!" she put in, "She seems like a lovely girl."

Sirius rolled his eyes. “You’ll love her, believe me. Not sure why she’s settling for this bloke.” He elbowed James.

While James grinned, his father laughed heartily. "Think we ought to warn her?"

"Fleamont!" His wife scolded mildly. "What about you, Sirius? Have you got anyone special?"

“Um, well…” Sirius’ face grew warm. “Yes?”

She nodded, encouragingly. "That's lovely, I'm sure she is too. You are quite a good looking boy, you know," she patted his arm with a warm smile, "You needn't be shy."

Face burning now, Sirius kept his eyes on the table and mumbled, “Actually, it’s a ‘he.’”

"Oh?" Euphemia paused, "Well, that's lovely too." She gave his hand another pat, while James relaxed back into his chair.

"Leave them both be, Euphie!" Fleamont admonished, "What I want to know, is whether James is half the chaser he lets on this year, or if all this Lily nonsense is going to cost us the house cup!"

“Oh, I don’t think you need to worry,” Sirius replied. “He’s as devoted to his ball-playing as ever. I think the idea of impressing Evans only motivates him more.”

"You just might be right," Fleamont shared a smile with Sirius, "Glad hear it from a reliable source! In that case, how would you boys fancy going to the match Saturday? Caerphilly Catapults are challenging Falmouth. We could make a day of it!"

“Sure, why not?” A more honest expression of his opinion would have been throwing a fist in the air and shouting his agreement--which was odd; why was he so excited about an old quidditch match?

With an enthused grin, James reached over to shake Sirius' shoulder. "Sounds great, dad!"

Fleamont nodded, a satisfied glint in his eye, "Maybe you can learn a thing or two. Have you played, Sirius?"

Sirius quickly shook his head. “No, I’ll leave that to James. I’m still not sure I quite understand it, to be honest. Chasers and beaters and bludgers… isn’t it a bit uncivilized?”

With raised eyebrows, James and his father turned to Sirius in synchronicity. "Right! goodbye, Padfoot," James got up as if to drag Sirius away.

Fleamont burst into a laugh, "Never quite heard it put that way, but I suppose it is at that. But maybe that's what makes it so exciting?" He winked.

"Now then, you lot!" Euphemia shooed James away with a smack in his direction. "Your brother plays, doesn't he?"

Sirius snapped a biscuit in two before he answered, in an even tone, “Yes, he does. For Slytherin.”

"Then he can't be all that good," Fleamont joked.

"Fleamont!" his wife chided good-naturedly, a replying smile tugging as she occupied his gaze. "You might try not to offend our guest."

The corners of Sirius’ mouth quirked up. “Actually, he’s right. Regulus thinks he’s all that, but just because you own a Nimbus doesn’t mean you’ve actually got any talent.”

James snickered, exchanging a look with him. "Doesn't it, though?"

Glancing a mild reprimand at her son, Euphemia got up. As she crossed behind Sirius, she rested a hand on his shoulder, "Are you hungry then for something proper?"

“Yeah, sounds great.” Sirius twisted his head to offer her a smile. “Can’t wait to try it, I’ve heard stories.”

 

III.

Like a deep breath returning it to life, the dormitory filled again with its students. James had seen that they took the early train, betraying his reason at the first sight of certain tumbled copper curls. Their room now held three out of the four travel cases, each as lazily unpacked as the other. The room’s sole current occupant lay on his bed, eyes closed, trying to simply listen to the music blaring from his record player, as if he wasn’t counting every second and fighting the urge to jump up and pace.

Muffled by the track, the door opened to an off-balance Remus, shuffling inside with his beaten luggage under one arm. A smile brightened his lips as he saw Sirius, closing the door behind him. "How was James'?" he called over the music. At the awaited voice, Sirius’ eyes flew open, and he launched himself off the bed and into Remus to throw his arms around him.

As Remus staggered back a half step, his bag landed by his feet with a dull thud. Catching their balance, he pulled Sirius close to him. As their faces nearly brushed, his smile parted in a joyful breath. "I missed you too," he said, as if in reply.

Sirius squeezed him tighter for a long moment, then let go to pull back and look at him, one hand still on his shoulder and the other running through his hair. “Two weeks is too fucking long, Moony.”

"It wasn't quite two weeks," Remus laughed as he let himself bend towards Sirius. "But I have got something for you!" he said suddenly. Stooping to retrieve his case, he rummaged in it, before shyly producing a maroon lump. As he held it up, it fell into the shape of a large, handknit jumper. "It's nothing much, just mum made it, and she said you could have it, since you like them."

“Moony! Moony’s mum!” Sirius grabbed the jumper and held it at arm’s length to admire it. “Tell her it’s the nicest gift anyone’s ever given me.” He hastily pulled it over his head and then flung out his arms. “How do I look?”

Remus’ hesitation dissipated in the wake of Sirius' enthusiasm. "I think it looks nice," he offered, a clear fondness for both the garment and its wearer in his regard. "You really like it?"

“I love it.” Sirius strode to his dresser and pushed the piles of clutter to either side so he could get a better view in the mirror. “I look so cozy,” he marveled, turning one way and then the other. He caught Remus’ eye in the mirror and smiled. “I look like I’m borrowing your clothes.”

"Is that alright?" Remus asked, joining Sirius in the mirror frame. "I mean, I know it's nothing special, and you don't have to wear it 'out,' or--"

“Hey.” Turning, Sirius draped his arms around Remus’ neck. “I adore it, and I’m going to wear it everywhere. Watch me.”

"Alright." Softly smiling, Remus leaned his head to Sirius until their foreheads touched. For a long moment, Sirius stood still, drinking in the warmth of Moony’s skin, the thud of his heartbeat, the soft brush of his breath. And then, for the first time in eleven days, the feeling of Remus’ lips against his.

Slowly at first, lips embraced lips in a tumble of longing and adoration. Remus pulled Sirius closer, feeling the arms tighten about his shoulders. Behind them, the record played into a hushed epilogue of static. It skipped into silence as it was jarred abruptly from the perimeter.

Lying on his bed with Remus in his arms some time later, Sirius said with a smirk, “In case it isn’t obvious by now, I missed you a lot.”

Remus tilted his head towards Sirius, a glow still warm on his cheeks as their breath quieted. "It certainly seems so," he admitted happily. Shifting in Sirius' embrace, he rolled onto his back. "You never did say," he nudged, "How were the Potters?"

Sirius’ mind instantly shifted gears as he recalled the visit. “God, Moony, I understand now why people like their parents! They were…” He hunched his shoulders in a deep shrug, having a hard time finding the words. “Everything parents should be, I guess. Mr. Potter took us to a quidditch game, Mrs. made so much food I probably gained a few kilos, and they…” He scrunched up his face as he thought. “Well, somehow, they actually liked me. I was practically part of the family from the moment I stepped foot inside.”

Half of Remus' mouth curved into a smile, "That's really lovely." As they lay, now side by side, he slipped his hand into Sirius', entwining their fingers with a gentle press.

“What about you?” Sirius asked. “How’s your mum doing?”

"She's... alright," Remus answered. "Dad too." There was a pause. "I was glad to see them." The simplicity in his tone was bittersweet.

“Is that all?” Sirius asked with a teasing smile, squeezing Remus’ hand. “Surely you’ve got more to tell me than that. It was eleven whole days, after all.”

Remus allowed a laugh, "Alright, let's see. Just stayed about, really. Got things tidied up. Mum finished that," he nodded towards the knit. He smiled, and shrugged. "There was lots to do, but it was nice. Told her what you all have been up to, of course."

“Probably not everything we’ve been up to,” Sirius answered with a sly grin. “But it does sound nice. I’ll have to meet them someday. If you want.” He gave Remus a quick glance.

"No, not everything," Remus admitted with a slight flush. Turning his head, he met Sirius' gaze. "But, yes, maybe," the words sounded hopeful.

“Good. I’d like that.” Sirius’ thumb caressed Remus’ hand as he settled into the contented feeling of being exactly where he wanted to be.

 

**~ May 1977 ~**

I.

The door of the dorm room cracked open and Sirius stuck his head inside to see if Remus was still asleep--which he was--before stepping through. Easing the door shut behind him, he dropped his bag and melted down into dog form to trot up to Remus’ bed. After readying himself in a crouch, he sprang up onto the mattress, stuck his nose into Remus’ face, and began licking it.

"Sirius!" Remus protested sleepily, fumbling for the shaggy muzzle with little effort to push away the affection. "What--," he laughed, "What are you doing?" Wiping his face from the onslaught, he blinked at the canine.

Sirius sank down by Remus’ side, front legs stretched out before him, and rested his head on them to blink contentedly at Remus. Gently, his fingers buried into the fur at Sirius' neck, working their way lovingly into the tangles and forming more of their own. A still-drowsy smile rested placidly behind his own unkempt brown strands and the whispers of grey threaded among them. Sirius let his eyes close and leaned into Remus’ touch, nestling closer against him. Propping himself on one elbow, Remus leaned his other arm around the dog-form beside him and pressed his face into the fur. Sirius’ breathing slowed as he started to drift into a comfortable half-sleep, his dog body quite amenable to napping.

As Sirius' flanks began to quiet to a gentle rhythm, Remus withdrew enough to watch him, stroking the glossy coat. "You're entirely ridiculous, you know," a soft laugh escaped Remus' lips. With both arms, he tugged the lazy creature closer to him and nuzzled a kiss between his ears. Sirius’ eyes opened just slightly, and he stretched out his tongue to catch Remus on the cheek again. Grinning, Remus shrugged it off against his shoulder. Another quick kiss on the wet nose, and he rolled onto his back, arms open for Sirius to join him--which Sirius immediately did, scrambling up to resettle himself on Remus’ chest and stare into his eyes.

He shifted under the dog's weight, finding a comfortable place to settle his hands into the scruff at the shoulders. Together, their breathing found a shared tempo as Remus returned the gaze. "You know," he mused softly, ruffling the hairy ears, "You are the only one I've ever…kissed." A laugh involuntarily punctuated the reflection, immediately self-conscious. "I-- don't know why I've said that just now. And don't say the only dog," he protested, "because you know perfectly well--"

As he spoke, the dog shifted and a moment later human Sirius lay sprawled over Remus, arms folded on his chest. “Is that so,” he answered with a sly grin. “I wish I’d known sooner that staring into my big dog eyes would get you to spill all your secrets.”

"Surely, it wasn't a secret," the hue of his complexion brightened rapidly. "I'm sure you..."

“Moony.” Sirius rolled his eyes with a quick affectionate shake of his head. “All I ever did before was kiss two girls, and only just enough to find that I did not like it. So I don’t think that really counts. Meaning--” Now he blushed and let his head collapse onto Remus’ chest to muffledly conclude, “Well, I’m sorry your first experience had to be with me.”

"No, it's not that," a smile flickered back to his mouth before quieting again, "I just never thought there'd... be anyone." He drew his arms around Sirius, who lifted his head and squirmed up to rest it again next to Remus’ on the pillow.

“Moony.” Now he said it softly, bringing a hand up to rest against Remus’ cheek. “I’m sure there are a hundred ‘anyones’ out there who’d be overjoyed to be with you. I’m just lucky it got to be me.”

Remus tilted towards Sirius, his smile both adoring and grateful. "You think that?" The corner of his mouth tugged to a surer curve as he studied Sirius' face. "The last part; I don't care about the rest."

“Of course I do.” Sirius lifted his other arm to comb the hair out of Remus’ eyes. “I love you. So much.” Sliding his hand to the back of Remus’ neck, he pulled him closer and let their lips brush before turning it into a full kiss. As Remus slipped his arms around Sirius, they entwined with gentle fingers and eager mouths. Breath met breath in each loving reply. Then, in the quiet, voices began to murmur beyond the door.

“Fuck,” Sirius groaned, pulling away. “Can’t they ever leave us in peace?”

Remus instinctively rolled away from Sirius, hurriedly sitting up. Abashed satisfaction lingered in his downcast gaze. A moment later, the creak of heavy hinges admitted a cautious James, with Lily rivaling in tow. Seeing them alert, James dropped his clumsy attempt at courtesy, letting the door close behind them noisily.

"If you were really that concerned, we might have gone to the library," Lily laughed.

“Are you two going to ‘study’?” Sirius asked, still lounging against the pillow.

"I don't know what sort of 'studying' you get up to, Black," Lily teased, "But we are going to study." She carefully changed the intonation as she repeated, and shot a sideways look at James for agreement.

“We’ll see about that,” Sirius muttered. Pushing himself up, he glanced back at Remus. “Hungry at all?”

"I suppose, sure," Remus shrugged amenably. He swung his legs over the edge.

Lily watched them as they began to vacate the bed. "You really don't have to go," she assured, offering, "James and I can go if you like."

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” Sirius answered, getting to his feet. “Stay. We’re off to find food. I’m sure you’ll still be… studying when we get back.” He gave them a smirk on his way to the door.

"Easy, mate," James placated with a laugh and mock offense. "We'll see you later on, then--"

Lily put a hand on her hip, cocking her stance to one side. "No, wait up," she announced, with a slight annoyance edging her tone, "You don't get to have it all one way, Mr. Black. James is being perfectly pleasant--for once. Do you not like me?"

"Lily!" James interjected, "Of course not! Padfoot, tell her!"

Sirius turned to give her an incredulous look. “You know that’s not true, Ev--Lily. I was only teasing.” He narrowed his eyes at James, and then glanced quickly at Remus.

James and Remus shared similar replies of uncertainty and surprise at the outburst. While the first seemed to be searching for an answer, the latter showed no sign of intervening.

"Then what is it?" Lily pushed, shaking off James as he touched her elbow.

“You know what? Fine.” Sirius tossed his hair back and marched up to Lily. “You want to know what’s up?” he hissed, leaning in close, eyes locked on hers. “Remus and I are an item, and you cannot tell anybody.”

"Thank you!" Lily exclaimed, throwing her hands up in relief. "Now can you stop sulking and get over yourself? Honestly, Remus, I don't know how you put up with him..."

“Hey!” Sirius folded his arms and glared at her. “You don’t know what it’s like.” Shifting his gaze to address James as well, he went on, “You get to go out there and hold hands, and kiss each other, and do whatever you want, and no one cares. But we have to sneak, and hide, and worry, because if anyone found out…”

Uncomfortably, Remus edged closer to Sirius, brushing his arm. "Sirius, it's fine," he soothed, barely above a whisper.

"It's not fine!" James retorted, "It's ridiculous! You are absolutely right!"

Lily nodded, her mouth scrunched to an equally disappointed acknowledgement, "I'd just rather not be one of those people you two have to hide from."

“Well, now you’re not anymore,” Sirius returned. “Happy?” Some of the fight had gone out of his tone, though, and he let his arms fall to his sides, taking Remus’ hand in one of his own.

Lily nodded again, the quiet satisfaction softened with understanding. Hesitantly, Remus let their fingers lace, watching them slip together. A fragile smile began to form as he looked up at Sirius. Sirius smiled back at him, then glanced at Lily again. “Thanks,” he said softly. “You’re a good sort, Evans.”

"You aren't so bad yourself," she returned with a wink.

Remus glanced towards the door just as footfalls in the hall erupted into an abrupt entrance. Shedding parchment scrolls in his wake from an overstuffed satchel, Peter stopped to stare at them, glancing between the pairs. "What've I missed now?" he hurried, searching them for the answer.

A smile widening at the haphazard figure, James ensnared Peter under one arm as soon as he ambled into reach. "Nothing, Wormy," he grinned, "I think we are all up to speed." Throwing his other arm around Sirius, he jostled them roughly. As Lily bounced onto the bed, she beamed approval, patiently perching beside her books. "Hey, don't think you get out of this, Lils," James teased, eying her. "You know too much already."

While James released his friends to capture Lily, Peter's face shaped dawning recognition at the hands that Sirius and Remus still shared. Lily squealed in protest. Peter began to point towards his discovery. And Remus laughed softly and, leaning into Sirius, squeezed his hand.

 

**~ Epilogue ~**

I.

The soft blue of twilight was creeping in the windows of the dorm room, but neither of its occupants had sought a light. The evening found them, as it so often did, lying close in Remus’ bed, Sirius’ arms wrapped around him from behind. Silence pervaded but for the soft sounds of their breath; they might almost have been asleep. But Sirius could feel Remus’ heartbeat still pounding a wakeful rhythm, and finally, he shifted slightly and spoke.

“I’ve been thinking.” The words were soft, barely above a whisper. “About the future. You know, with end-of-year coming, and everybody making plans… I don’t want to leave.” His arms tightened around Remus for a moment. “But, since I don’t think Dumbledore would condone us staying on for an eighth year, you know that money from my uncle? I’ve decided to use it to get a flat in London—for us. If, that is”—he pulled back slightly to watch Remus—“you want to.”

Remus shifted onto his back, one arm curling over his head as he found Sirius' eyes in the dimming half-light. "Do you... Think it would be safe?"

“Of course,” Sirius answered immediately. “We’ll take all the precautions we need--we’ll make a safe room. And it’ll be much more pleasant than the Shrieking Shack.”

Slowly, he nodded, his mind assembling the imagination. "Sirius, I don't want you to feel as if you need to care for me." He slipped his hand into Sirius'. "I know you would, but-- There's so much you can do; you and James."

“Well, that’s the other part.” Sirius squeezed Remus’ hand and sighed. “I’m going to be a bloody auror. With James. I figure I should do something with all this knowledge, right? And, you know, there’s that pesky business of earning a living.” He slipped his hand free to caress Remus’ face. “But you’ll always come first. Nothing you or anyone else could say will change that.”

Again, he nodded in the steeping shadows. "Alright," Remus whispered, moving their hands onto his chest. A heartbeat passed. "Good, I'm glad you mean to. You'll both be brilliant." Another heartbeat. "I wish I could have done that with you. I'd... I'd have been good at it."

Sirius pressed his face into Remus’ neck, unable to meet his wistful gaze. “I wish you could too, Moony,” he answered, the words muffled. “I’d give anything.” But then he lifted his head to look at Remus once more. “I’m sure it will be dreadfully dull, though. I’ll spend all day wishing I was home with you.” A smile touched his lips. “Because we’ll have a home, just the two of us. No silly James or Peter blundering in.”

Turning towards Sirius, Remus butted him gently. "Where do you mean to look?" Slipping his hand free, he brushed his fingertips along Sirius' features to where dark hair curled at the corner of the jawline.

“Somewhere far away from my parents, is my main criteria.” Sirius’ face wrinkled in disgust, but then he let it relax again, leaning ever so slightly into Remus’ touch. “We’ll look together, find somewhere we both like. Maybe close to James--but not too close.”

 

II.

Sirius stared at his face in the mirror, hand pushing his toothbrush back and forth mechanically. Was this real? Was he really standing in the bathroom of a flat he and Remus had picked out, that he’d signed a lease for, making it theirs for the next year? Had they really chosen furniture together--including, because he found it hilarious, a dog bed--some of which had been delivered to their door today? Were they really… adults, living on their own, with no more supervision, no one in charge to tell them what to do and not do? Honestly, it might all be a hallucination, some sort of test dreamed up by Dumbledore, and he was actually sitting in a classroom back at Hogwarts.

Hallucination or not, though, he was certainly going to enjoy it while it lasted. He spit and rinsed his mouth, then flipped off the light and bounded into the bedroom, where Remus was lying with the duvet tucked around him, reading. “Moony!” Sirius leaped onto the bed, barefoot and shirtless, and scrambled under the covers to snuggle next to Remus. “We have our own bed, Moony! And it’s big, and it’s comfortable, and it’s ours, and it’s in our own flat where no one can come in to disturb us.”

Remus took a breath and held it as Sirius slipped his arms around him. He half-smiled, unconsciously tugging the wrists of the old jumper over his hands as he adjusted his book. "Yeah," he admitted in disbelief, "It's a bit strange, isn't it?"

“It’s like a dream,” Sirius agreed, settling his cheek against Remus’. “The best dream.”

Letting himself exhale, Remus left the book on his lap and returned an embrace in agreement. "You still like these?" he smiled, tracing a finger over the runes marking Sirius' skin.

“I love them,” Sirius answered proudly. Every minute, every penny had been worth it; every prick of the needle had brought him closer to feeling released from his family, his old life. And when he’d stood to admire them in the mirror, he’d truly felt like his own person, his individuality indelibly written on his body, separating him from the Blacks forever. He flopped onto his back and settled his hands under his head to show them off better.

Settling lower next to him, Remus continued to follow the strokes with light touches across his shoulder and down Sirius' chest. There was still a newness to this freedom together, and a hesitation. "I do too," he said.

“Good. Because you’re going to be seeing a lot of them.” Sirius gave him a sly grin and then shifted to free his hands, sliding one under Remus’ jumper and up his back.

With a sudden laugh, Remus flinched at the unexpected sensation. "Is-- is that so?" he maintained, implicit trust hedged by uncertainty. In answer, Sirius walked his fingers farther up Remus’ back and then pulled him closer, rubbing his hand across the smooth skin.

Remus felt the hem of his jumper creep up his torso, baring the web of scars that hid beneath. Glancing down at them, he tensed. Immediately, he looked back to Sirius. "I guess, you'll be seeing a lot of these too..." he attempted.

Sirius’ hand trailed back down to gently touch one of the scars on Remus’ stomach. “Do you hate them?” he asked softly. “Is that why all the jumpers?”

His lips parted, then he shrugged helplessly and pressed them back together. "I'd just rather not think about them. Seems silly, doesn't it?"

“It’s not silly,” Sirius hastened to assure him. “It’s… a trauma.” He pulled his hand away and smoothed the jumper back down. “You don’t have to think about them if you don’t want to.”

Remus let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and looked at Sirius gratefully. "Only, I do want other things, too," he added, taking Sirius' hand and cautiously replacing it on his body. "So... let's just not think about them right now, alright?"

“Fine by me.” Sirius grinned at him. “We’ve got plenty of other things to think about.”

 

III.

The cottage was small, but aglow with the warmth of holiday lights that glimmered from the silted panes. Inside, the meagre furniture was arranged in stark newness, not yet settled into carpet divots or collecting the dust of hominess. But, despite still-packed boxes, festivities had merrily realized their cheer in twinkling strands and bunched sprigs at the window sills. With an arm around Lily's waist, James stood in the sparse living room, a glass held pleasantly.

"Well, now it feels like home," he announced, nodding the glass towards the other three.

Lily beamed in agreement, her hands clasped together over James' shoulder. "We are so glad you've come out," she nodded, leaning her cheek into James. "And..." she prompted.

"And!" James redoubled his enthusiasm, "Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, and Padfoot..." he paused for effect, "We would like you to be the first to know that there is going to be another little marauder."

"I should hope not!" Lily laughed, "The four of you are quite enough."

James grinned irrepressibly, "Too late to worry about that, Lils. Especially with Padfoot to show him the ropes."

Lily threw up one hand in defeat, "We don't know it's a 'he,' of course" she shot a look at James who returned it confidently, "But, Sirius, we'd like you to be godfather, if you would."

“Well, you two certainly wasted no time.” Sirius smirked at them, and then the look softened. “But yes, of course I will.”

"As if there was any doubt!" James insisted.

Lily shook her head and gave Remus a meaningful look. Silently, he broke an understanding grin, and put a hand on Sirius' shoulder. Lily nodded.

"Well, you two aren't too old to have fun, yet!" Peter interjected. Leaning towards the radio, he fiddled until it crackled to life. "Mrs. Potter," he held out a hand, "May I?"

With a bemused grin, Lily found herself urged on by James. Sipping his glass, he watched as Peter embraced the drama of his ill-educated waltz. "Pretty sure that's not the sort of dance this music is meant for, Wormy," James advised, leaning on the arm of the couch. "Here, let me show you!" As he set his glass aside, James secured Peter's hands through Lily and trapping her between them as he adopted her part.

Sirius rolled his eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile. Turning to Remus, he gave an exaggerated bow and asked, “May I have this dance?”

With a roll of his eyes, Remus took the offered hand and let himself be pulled to the center of the room. Slowly, they began to sway with the radio. “Are we doing this right, Prongs?” Sirius called over Remus’ shoulder.

"Are any of you?" Lily laughed.

James threw a grin at them, spinning her around. "Looks fine to me, Padfoot," he winked. "And I think you're improving too, Pete."

Remus shook his head, putting his arms around Sirius, and began to guide gently. Sirius relaxed into his lead, linking his fingers behind Remus’ neck, even letting his eyes close for a moment until he got off-balance and nearly stumbled. He laughed at himself and gave Remus a sheepish smile. Steadying them, Remus chuckled.

Lily managed to extricate herself from Peter and James who continued to further stray from what could be considered dancing. As she retrieved cake from the kitchen, James moved to help her, Peter in tow. Smacking their hands away, she began to serve neatly onto plates. While the radio crackled on, Remus pulled Sirius to his side and leaned his head against him. Securing an arm around him, Sirius leaned back and watched the other three with a grin, warmth spreading through his chest.

The end.


End file.
